You Know You Love Me (11 page)

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Authors: Cecily von Ziegesar

Tags: #Young Adult, #Romance, #Chick-Lit, #Contemporary

BOOK: You Know You Love Me
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Jenny was a zombie on Thursday from missing a whole nights sleep, but shed gotten the Kiss
on the Lips invitations done, and now she and Dan each had an invitation of their very
own. She was starving, too, having consumed only a banana and an orange for dinner the
night before. Shed even skipped her morning chocolate-chip scone. So, at lunch, Jenny
wrangled two grilled cheese sandwiches and two coffee yogurts out of the Constance lunch
ladies and carried her feast out into the cafeteria, hunting for a seat at a quiet table.
While she ate, she had to make up the homework shed skipped last night.

Jenny chose a table in front of the wall of mirrors on the far side of the cafeteria. None
of the older girls liked to eat lunch by the mirrors because it made them feel fat, so
that table was always empty. Jenny put her tray down, and was about to start stuffing her
face when she noticed a sign-up sheet taped to the mirror.

Jenny lunged for her backpack to find a pen. She scribbled her name at the top of the
listshe was the first one to sign up!and then sat down in front of her heaping tray of
food, her heart pounding. Life was full of miracles. It just got better and better. More
miraculous still, Serena van der Woodsen herself was coming out of the lunch line and
making a beeline for Jenny, carrying her tray. Was Serena actually going to sit with her?
In person? Deep breath in, deep breath out. Hi, Serena said, beaming at Jenny and setting
her tray down. God, she was beautiful. Her hair was the pale gold color some of the other
Constance girls tried to achieve by spending four hours in the hair salon on the top floor
of Bergdorf Goodman getting their highlights done. But Serenas was natural, you could
tell. Did I just see you sign up to help with my movie? Serena asked. Jenny nodded,
speechless in the presence of such greatness. Well, youre the only one so far, Serena
sighed, sitting down across from Jenny, facing the wall of mirrors. She didnt have to
worry about feeling fat when she ate. She didnt have any fat. She raised her golden
eyebrows at Jenny. So, what can you do? Jenny poked at her grilled cheese. She couldnt
believe shed gotten two sandwiches. Serena probably thought she was a disgusting pig.
Well, Im pretty artistic. I did the school hymnals, you know, in calligraphy? And Ive got
some photographs in Rancor this year, and a short story, Jenny explained. Rancor was
Constances student-run arts magazine. Vanessa Abrams was the editor. Oh, and I just did
the invitations for that big party next week that everyones going to, Jenny said, eager to
impress. Blair Waldorf asked me to do them. Actually . . . Jenny reached into her bag and
pulled out an envelope with Serenas name printed on it in ornate calligraphy. The guest
list Blair gave me still had your boarding school address. I was going to put it in your
locker or something, Jenny said, blushing. But now that youre here . . . She handed the
envelope to Serena. Do I sound like a stalker? Jenny wondered. Thanks, Serena said, taking
the envelope. She opened it and read the invitation inside, her eyes dark, her forehead
creased in a frown. Oh, God. She thinks its ugly! Jenny thought, panicking. Serena put the
invitation in her bag and picked up her fork again,

looking distracted. She took a bite of lettuce and chewed on it. Jenny was taking mental
notes on how to act as mysterious, poised, and cool as Serena was acting at that very
moment. If only she could have heard the livid thoughts in Serenas head, railing against
Blair. She didnt want me to come to the party. She didnt even tell me there was a party.
Wow, Serena said finally, still munching her lettuce. Okay, youre hired. She held out her
hand and smiled sweetly at Jenny. Im Serena, she said. I know, Jenny said, blushing even
redder. Im Jenny.

Disclaimer: All the real names of places, people, and events have been altered or
abbreviated to protect the innocent. Namely, me. hey people! S AND B: HOT IN THE HOT TUB!

This just in from an anonymous source: Apparently, back when they were still tight, S and
B shared a hot hot-tub moment together in Cs suite in the Tribeca Star. Was the kiss an
expression of their true feelings for each other? Or were they just messing around like
two silly drunk girls? Either way, it definitely adds a little tension to the mix. What
fun!

And in case you havent seen the poster plastered on all the buses, taxis, and subways all
over town, the original photo of S can still be seen at the Whitehot Gallery in Chelsea,
amidst portraits of other notorious scenesters, myself included. Thats right! The Remi
brothers were just too sexy to resist. The fabulous are fabulous for a reason, people.

Your E-mail

Dear Gossip Girl,I wont tell you who I am, but Im in the Remi brothers show too. I really
love their work, and I love the picture they took of me, but no way would I let them put
it on the side of a bus. If you ask me, S is asking for whatever she gets. And from what
Im hearing, shes getting it.Anonomy

Dear Anonomy, Its cool to be modest, but personally, if you wanted to put any bit of me on
the side of a bus, Id be willing. Im a fame whore.GG Sightings

Little J buying a huge book on filmmaking at Shakespeare and Co. on Broadway. N hanging
out with C at a bar over on First Avenue. Guess N wants to keep his eye on C so C doesnt
spill the beans, huh? And B buying lots of candles in a shop on Lex for her big night with
N.

Thats all for now. Have fun this weekendI definitely will. You know you love me,

The Star Lounge in the Tribeca Star Hotel was big and swanky, filled with comfy armchairs
and ottomans and circular banquettes, so that the guests could feel like they were having
their own private party at each table. One wall was lit with dozens of black candles,
flickering in the dimly lit room, and a DJ was playing mellow lounge beats on a turntable.
It was only eight oclock, but the bar was already jammed with people, dressed in the
hippest fashions and sipping pastel-colored cocktails.

Blair didnt care what time it wasshe needed a drink. She was sitting in an armchair right
near the bar, but the stupid cocktail waitress was ignoring her, probably because Blair
hadnt bothered to dress up. She had worn her faded Earl jeans and a boring black sweater
because she was only meeting Serena for a quick drink before she went home to prepare for
her night of wild sex with Nate. And she wasnt going to dress up for that, either. Blair
had decided to meet Nate at the door naked. Her face grew hot just thinking about it, and
she looked around the room self-consciously. She felt like a loser sitting there all by
herself without even a drink. Where was Serena, anyway? She didnt have all goddamned
night. Blair lit a cigarette. If Serena doesnt come by the time Im done with this
cigarette, Im leaving, she told herself sulkily. Look at her, Blair heard a woman say to
her friend. Isnt she beautiful? Blair turned to look. Of course it was Serena. She was
wearing blue suede knee-high boots and a real Pucci dress. Long sleeved with a high neck
and a crystal beaded belt, in blues, oranges, and greens. It was super fantastic. Her hair
was pulled up in a high ponytail on top of her head and she was wearing pale blue eye
shadow and creamy pink lipstick. She smiled and waved at Blair from across the room,
weaving her way through the crowd. Blair watched the heads turn as she passed, and her
stomach churned. She was already sick of Serena, and she hadnt even spoken to her yet. Hi,
Serena said, plunking herself down on a square ottoman beside Blairs chair. Immediately,
the cocktail waitress appeared. Hey Serena, long time no see. Hows your brother? the
waitress said. Hey Missy. Eriks good. Hes too busy to call me ever. I think he must have
like, eight different girlfriends up there, Serena laughed.

How are you doing? Im great, Missy said. Hey listen, my sister works for a caterer, you
know, and she said she saw you a few days ago at a party she was working at a gallery in
Chelsea. She said thats you in that picture on all the buses. Is that true? Yeah, Serena
said. Pretty crazy, huh? You are so rad! Missy squealed. She glanced at Blair who was
glaring at her. Anyway, what can I get you girls? Ketel One and tonic, Blair told her,
looking her straight in the eye, daring her to card them. Extra limes. But Missy would
rather lose her job than hassle Serena van der Woodsen for being underage. Thats the whole
reason for going to hotel bars in the first place: no one ever cards. And for you,
sweetie? Missy asked Serena. Oh, I better start with a Cosmo, Serena said, and laughed. I
need something pink to go with my dress. Missy hurried away to fetch the drinks, eager to
tell the bartender that the girl in the Remi brothers photo that was all over town was
sitting in their bar and they were pals! Sorry Im late, Serena told Blair, looking around.
I thought everyone else would be here with you. Blair shrugged her shoulders and took a
long drag on her dwindling cigarette. I thought we could hang out by ourselves for a
while, she said. No one really comes out until later, anyway. Okay, Serena said. She
smoothed out her dress and dug around in her little red purse for her own pack of
cigarettes. Gauloises, from France. She tapped one out and stuck it in her mouth. Want
one? she offered Blair. Blair shook her head no. Theyre kind of strong, but the box is too
cool, I dont care. Serena laughed. She was about to light up with a pack of bar matches,
when the bartender swooped in with a lighter. Thanks, she said, raising her eyes to look
at him. The bartender winked at her and swiftly stepped back behind the bar. Missy brought
them their drinks. To old times, Serena said, clinking her glass against Blairs and taking
a long sip on her pink Cosmopolitan. She sat back on her stool and sighed with pleasure.
Dont you just love hotels? she said. Theyre so full of secrets. Blair raised her eyebrows
at Serena in silent response, sure that Serena was about to tell her all the wild and
crazy things that had happened to her in hotels while she was in Europe or wherever, as if
Blair cared.

I mean, dont you always think about what everyones doing in their rooms? Like, they could
be watching pornos and eating cheese doodles, or they could be having kinky sex in the
bathroom. Or maybe theyre just asleep. Uh-huh, said Blair disinterestedly, gulping her
drink. She would have to get a little drunk if she were going to make it through the
night, especially the naked part. So whats this about your picture being all over buses
and stuff? Blair said. I havent seen it. Serena giggled and leaned toward Blair
confidentially. Even if you saw it, you probably wouldnt recognize me. It has my name on
it, but its not a picture of my face. Blair frowned. I dont get it, she said. Its art,
Serena said mysteriously, and giggled again. She took a sip of her drink. The two girls
faces were only inches apart, and Blair could smell the musky essential-oil mixture Serena
had started wearing. I still dont get it. Is it something dirty? Blair said, confused. Not
really, Serena answered with a sly smile. Lots of people have had theirs done too. You
knowcelebrities. Like who? Blair said. Like Madonna, and Eminem, and Christina Aguilera.
Oh, Blair said, sounding unimpressed. Serenas eyes narrowed. Whats that supposed to mean?
she demanded. Blair lifted her chin and tucked her straight brown hair behind her ears. I
dont know, its like youre willing to do anything just to shock people. Dont you have any
pride? Serena shook her head, still staring at Blair. Like what? What have I done? she
said, frantically gnawing on her fingernails. Like getting kicked out of boarding school,
Blair said vaguely. Serena snorted. Whats so bad about that? Tons of people get kicked out
every year. They have so many stupid rules, its almost impossible not to get kicked out.
Blair pressed her lips together, measuring her words carefully. I dont mean that, I mean
why you got kicked out. There. She had done it. She had committed herself now. She was
going to have to sit and listen to Serena tell her all about the cults she had joined, and
the boys shed had sex with, and the drugs she had done. Shit. Dont believe for a minute
that she wasnt curious, though. Blair fiddled with the ruby ring on her finger, turning it
round and round. Serena raised her glass at Missy, asking for another drink. Blair, Serena
said. The only reason I got kicked out was because I didnt show up at the beginning of
school. I stayed in France. My parents didnt even know. I was supposed to fly back at the
end of

August, but I stayed until the third week in September. I was living in this amazing
chateau outside of Cannes, and it was like, a constant party. I dont think I slept a whole
night the entire time I was there. It was like those parties in that house in The Great
Gatsby.

There were these two boys, an older brother and a younger one, and I was totally in love
with both of them. Actually, she laughed, I was even more in love with their father, but
he was married. The Star Lounge DJ switched vibes and began to play a funky acid jazz song
with a cool beat. The lights dimmed and the candles flickered. Serena jiggled her foot to
the music and glanced at Blair, whose eyes were glazing over.

Serena lit another cigarette and inhaled deeply. Anyway, of course I partied a lot at
school, but so did everyone else. What the school couldnt deal with was that I didnt even
bother to show up at the beginning of the year. I dont blame them, I guess. But to tell
you the truth, I really didnt care about going back to school. I was having way too much
fun. Blair rolled her eyes again. She honestly didnt care what the truth was. Did you ever
think about the fact that these are like, the most important years of our lives? Like, for
getting into college and everything? she said. Missy brought Serenas drink, and this time
Serena only nodded her thanks. She looked down at the floor, her pinky nail between her
teeth. Yeah, Im just realizing that now, she admitted. I hadnt thought about it beforehow
I should have been joining teams and clubs. You know, getting really into the school
thing. Blair shook her head. I feel sorry for your parents, she said quietly. Serenas eyes
were getting big, and her lip was trembling. But she was determined not to let Blair make
her cry. Blair was just being a bitch, thats all. Maybe she was getting her period. Serena
took a huge gulp of her drink and wiped her mouth with her cocktail napkin. So, you never
told me what you and Nate did all summer. Did you ever go up to Maine and see that boat he
built? she asked, completely changing the subject. Blair shook her head. I had tennis
camp. It sucked. Oh, Serena said. They drank their drinks in awkward silence. Serena sat
up suddenly, remembering something. Hey, she said. You know, some girl actually signed up
to help me with my movie? A ninth grader. Her name is Jenny. And she gave me an invitation
to that party next week. You know, the one youve been planning? TouchŽ, girlfriend. TouchŽ.

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