A New Dream [Dreams: 1] (7 page)

C
hapter 10 –
J
ames:
Dive in the unknown

G
od was it hard to resist temptation today! To be honest, James had been avoiding David all week.

Ever since he had met the man on the plane and seen the vulnerability and the sadness in his eyes, he constantly wanted to comfort him, take him in his arms and help him forget his sad memories. And he got carried away by his feelings, during that first night. When he had seen him spread out on the sheets in the late afternoon’s light…he sighed. No use in re-playing the scene time and again.

He had done that enough, thank you very much. God, how many times had he got off, as he thought of the slim body, pressed against him, naked under his sheets? He’d had to stifle his moans―in bed at night, in the shower in the morning and wherever he was during the day―as the memories kept popping up in his mind. He had to go away, hide in public, keep himself busy, in order to try to escape his own desires.

He didn’t want to take care of this man. He didn’t want the affection. And he certainly didn’t want the feeling James would provoke in David’s heart. He was not being presumptuous. He knew that David fancied him or he wouldn’t have had the reaction he had with him on the plane and later in bed that very same day. But he couldn’t afford being more involved with him. He had the feeling that David could easily lose himself in the meanderings of his heart. Now
that
was something which would never happen to James…

He had never been a romantic, probably because of his history. Between his parents and the military life, there had been no hope for a long-term relationship. He had avoided second dates like the plague; his relationship with Elliot had been the only one. Besides, it had lasted mere months anyway. One-night-stands were more satisfying in a way but there were times that he had wished he could cuddle on the couch, making out lazily, a dumb TV show on in the background. Those thoughts were always quickly followed by thoughts of his mom, the lazy dream disappearing instantly.

Cuddles led to love. And love led to trust. And trust led to treason. Avoiding relationships so he wouldn’t be hurt was his motto, and it had worked pretty well so far.

Although, since he had met David, images would randomly pop up in his mind. Not the usual sex-on-the-go kind of images, but more like the tender hot-cocoa-in-front-of-the-fire kind. Like when he imagined them spooned under the blankets, their fingers entwined…

He found himself daydreaming quite often lately, as he stared out the window of the Trophy Room, the jock bar that had replaced Fritz. He had spent a lot of time there, slowly sipping a beer or two. Some men had tried to offer him a drink but he had declined. He was not in the mood for casual sex. He needed to think. Preferably alone.

He had gone for long walks on the Waterfront, the quarter near the Aquarium. It was one of his favorite locations in the city. He craved the smell of the ocean, the wind and the loud cry of the seagulls. He loved to watch the boats going back and forth between the islands and the harbor. It was soothing, almost mesmerizing. He would stroll and sometimes even sit on a bench on the Harborwalk, doing nothing but watching the activity around him.

Eventually, he would take the T to go home via the silver line, and hop off at Union Park Street, a couple of blocks away from the cathedral. He was not a religious man but he had spent some time in there, too. He found the atmosphere utterly calming, with its stone arches reaching the high ceiling, inwards curving ribs in a Gothic style, the rich red carpet and the stunning stained-glass windows. Over one-thousand-and-seven-hundred people could sit in the magnificent monument. He had always been in awe of such astounding architecture. Not far from it was another of his favorite spots in the city, the Franklin Zoo Park. Close to home as well, he would rest on a bench and sit there, blind to the diversity of animals and the passing visitors. He would only leave when the cold would make his teeth chatter.

The more he thought of it, the more he realized that it was hard to stay away from David. He was attracted to him like a moth to flames. But if he came closer, would he burn his wings? The morning of opening night, he got up with a loud sigh, he knew it would be difficult to avoid David today. He had begun his day by arguing about him with Bo.

They had come across him just as they were in the middle of their dispute and the look of him, so early in the morning, had sent shivers down his spine. His black jeans and this so-tight-it-was-indecent black t-shirt made his skin paler and his hair darker by comparison. There was no cryptic geeky message on this one, but it was even better. It was showing off his slender chest and, as he was standing next to the morning's delivery in front of the main door, an aureole of light made him look like an angel. He wore the new confidence and look of determination on his face well, even though James grew a little afraid of what David would do with it.

He had fled right after David had asked him whether he would attend the opening night. He had come back home only in time to dress up for the night. He was
not
a coward. He was a trained soldier, for God’s sake! He would not be led by the nose…or by the…well, you get the drift. He had balls, so he would get prepared, go downstairs, and survive.
It won’t be that difficult, right? Right?!

He was astonished by how difficult it had been to choose his clothes. James had never been foppish. He was the type of guy to stand in front of his wardrobe, waiting for the perfect outfit to emerge by itself and it normally didn't take hours. He liked nice garments and would buy pretty things but he would randomly put on what he had bought without second-guessing himself.

So, that night, after he got five different pairs of trousers and three t-shirts out of the closet, he decided to pick something haphazardly and wear it, no matter what. He ended up slipping on jeans and shirt, roughly the same color, before he took off for the bathroom. He spent half an hour trying to discipline his hair, the disheveled look taking more hard work than it seemed.
Not foppish, huh?! Yeah right…
he sighed inwardly, as he appraised himself one last time in the mirror.

Once ready, he had taken a deep breath to try to calm his nerves. He felt like he was standing at the back of a Hercules C-130, ready to do a parachute jump, but without being sure if the parachute would open or not.
So is that it? Is this caring about someone? Thinking about someone’s welfare before yours? Is this Lo...? No, I won’t go there. No, no and no!
They wouldn’t be more than fuck buddies. Never more. If he told himself that, again and again, maybe he would start believing it himself.

Glancing through the windows of the living room, James saw that the cathedral and the street lamps were the only source of light outside. It was getting late and he should hurry.
Get a fucking grip! You go downstairs, you talk to him, you enjoy the night and you see how it goes. At worst, you get rejected. At best, you two will fuck like bunnies and you’ll dump him when the morning comes.
He sighed again. He would never be able to ditch him after. David was not like the others. He couldn’t pinpoint why exactly.
Oh, I’m so screwed…

James walked into the room as the musicians were tuning their instruments. He had seen Sin busy with final preparations in the kitchen and Danny was finishing setting up the server's station, just off the hatch to the kitchen. Jet was rearranging some of the tables on the floor to create an easier access to both the bar and the kitchen. James turned slowly around, taking everything in, when he noticed David checking him out from behind the bar. Before he had the chance to say something, Bo came walking in from the bathrooms.

“David, ya ready?” he asked as he strode down the floor to the bar.

“Yes sir, Danny and Jet have finished setting up and Sin is good in the kitchen.” David replied as he placed the last glass back on the shelf behind him.

“Good. Let's get dis show on da road.” Bo made his way to the main doors, acknowledging the band as he marched past them and welcomed the guests as James sauntered into the kitchen.
Bo had drummed up a crowd, thanks to all sorts of social networks. He had even set up a public event on Facebook and had reached a large amount of people, in addition to the usual clientele of the bar who had been waiting impatiently for the bar to reopen after the renovation.

James had been taking food orders for the past hour as Bo helped Sin out preparing the food. The initial rush over, Bo told him to check out the bar. As he passed through the doors, he took a minute to observe the scene before him. The musicians were playing and the noise was melting nicely with the sound of glasses clinking and conversations and laughs. Some people were sitting in the booths but most of them were standing in small circles of friends, glass in hand. The atmosphere was friendly and it made James wants to have a seat and order a drink.

Despite the crowd, he had absolutely no difficulty spotting David. He was running behind the bar, maniacally serving drink after drink to a never-ending queue of patrons. James assessed him quietly. He was so beautiful―as frail as he was strong. He remembered the shape of his slim body. David was sinewy, the muscles in his thighs long but strong. He needed to eat more, for sure, and rest even more, he looked tired and had dark shadows under his eyes. On the other hand, the smile on his face indicated he was enjoying himself. Ogling him made James crave the embrace of the man. He felt as if he was falling from an elevator. Or as if he was bungee jumping, without the bungee cord…

Eventually, as if he had felt James’ glance on him, David lifted his head and, as their eyes met, James sensed a jolt of electricity shooting to his balls. For the second time that night, David took the time to eye him from head to toe. James felt like he was being stripped to the bone. When he cast a glance at James’ groin, David’s face heated and he looked even fiercer, like a man on a mission.
Oh, what is he up to, now?
Lil’ Jimmy―which wasn't all that little, by the way―chose this moment to stir in James’ boxer shorts, so not the best place to carry a jimmy. He couldn’t even go to the toilets and get some relief; that would definitely cost him some points with Bo.

Inwardly threatening Lil’ Jimmy with castration―which was usually the most efficient way to calm it down―James strolled over to the bar and leaned against it. He waited patiently for David to stop pouring a glass of beer and for him to lift his eyes again. When he did, James saw sparks shooting between them. He was stunned to feel it physically but a slow smile crept up at the corner of his lips. All week long, he tried to escape his fate but it seemed it was not what Life had planned for him. He was well and truly meant to be with this man. He accepted it now.
So be it!

An image came abruptly to his mind; he was on his knees, his lips wrapped around David’s manhood, his head bobbing frenetically between his man’s legs.
Get a grip!
He thought, as he attempted to get some air in his lungs. He wanted him so badly that he found it difficult to breathe. Finally, when David came over to talk to him, he was smirking, humor and desire fighting for the upper hand on his face.

“What will it be for you, Adonis?” he asked casually.

“Adonis? Damn, and here I thought I was still a simple human,” James claimed dramatically, a hand on his heart. “If you carry on like that, I’m gonna get a big head.” he added, smirking as he waited to see if his Frenchie would get the joke.

“A big head? Oh yeah, I could give you that.” David answered smugly.

James raised an eyebrow and decided to play it fully. The tip of his tongue darted out between his lips and he began to lick them slowly. David’s attention dropped to the enticing movement and he shivered as his eyes darkened in desire, the tension growing thicker between them. James wanted the night to be over already; he needed to be in his bedroom with David attached to the bed frame, and…
Oops
, his thoughts drifted dangerously.
It isn’t the moment, not yet…Lil’ Jimmy, get down!

“Your mouth's gaping, honey, and you’re drooling.” Jet sniggered as she passed behind David. He blushed instantaneously, dropping his eyes to the floor. His smile faltered and he looked deflated, as if he’d had to draw on his reserves to dare pronounce the last few words. His bubble of confidence had burst.

James left his spot at the counter and came behind the bar. David didn’t bat an eye when James moved to stand behind him, but his breath hitched when James pressed his hips against David’s ass. He rested his entire body against his back, from groin to shoulders, and passed a hand in front of David to grab a bottle of beer as his other hand supported him on the counter top at David's other side.

He glanced around the room but everyone was busy chatting with one with another. His mouth mere inches away from David’s ear, he shifted his erection against the man, revealing how turned on he was as he whispered raucously in his future lover’s ear. “When you're ready, I'll give you reasons to drool. We'll both be a god for each other. We'll share things you can't even imagine. I'll lick your body, take you in every possible way and when we get out of bed, neither of us will be able to think straight. We'll shake up our universes and won't ever be the same."

David trembled at James' words and his death grip on the bar's surface was a good sign of his current state of mind. He breathed heavily, his face flushed with arousal, as James trailed David’s ear lobe tenderly with his tongue. He pressed his hips against David’s loin and shuddered when his sex was tucked between David's firm buttocks, unable to stop the low moan that rumbled out of his throat. He moved backwards deliberately and resumed his earlier position at the bar. He turned toward the band and discreetly adjusted his member behind his fly, as he tried to focus his attention on the musicians.