Falling to Pieces (11 page)

As if he can feel my stare
burning through him, Sam looks up and meets my gaze. Instantly, he smiles and
drops his speed, heading toward me on the picnic table. Even sweating the man
is the sexiest thing I have ever seen.
 
I don’t know how he does it. I will plant myself on this very table every
day if I could be assured that Sam would be running by, looking just like this.

“It seems the scenery has
gotten much more enjoyable out here recently.” I say, openly admiring him from
top to bottom.

“You should join me sometime.”
Bending his leg at the knee, Sam reaches back pulling his foot farther so his
heel meets his nice round ass, stretching his quad.

“We both know that’s not going
to happen.” I laugh, pulling my eyes away from his lower body, meeting his eyes.
“Plus my short legs could never keep up with you.”

“Keeping up has never been an
issue for you, little red.” Sam winks at me.

Is he flirting with me?

Sam seems rather playful
today, and I like it. I also love hearing my nickname fall from his lips.

I continue to marvel at the
man in front of me,
which
causes something to stir
inside, and my breathing gets heavy. Sam seems to notice this change and I
swear his eyes darken with arousal. Slowly, he leans closer until he is right
in front of where I sit on top of the picnic table, bringing us to the same
height. His hands are bracing himself on both sides of me and his face is just
mere inches from mine. My gaze shifts from his eyes to his mouth and back
again, unsure where I want to focus the most.

As if sensing my dilemma, Sam
makes the decision for me and brings his mouth closer. The moment his soft full
lips touch mine, my heart begins to beat out of my chest. With no control over
my body’s function, and knowing I shouldn’t, I open my mouth and graze his lips
with my tongue.

Not missing the hint, Sam
takes control of the kiss, and the warmth of his tongue invading my mouth sends
an electric current straight through my body.

Leaning me backwards and
deepening the kiss, Sam is holding up my body with his hands at my lower back.
My arms wrap around his neck and my legs cross behind his back keeping him
pressed tight against me. Nothing else in this moment matters, except Sam. I
pay no attention to the catcalls coming from all around us, but just enjoy the
unsaid emotions that we are both pouring into this kiss.

Pulling away faintly, Sam
presses a kiss to my top lip, bottom, and both sides before resting his
forehead against mine. We are both panting, a little out of breath, attempting
to recover from what just happened. I can still feel him flowing inside me.

“I shouldn’t have done that.”
He whispers, with his eyes closed tightly. “I need to leave.”

With a quick kiss to my cheek,
Sam turns and takes off running down the trail away from me.

What the hell was that?

I stayed seated on the wooden picnic table for over an hour, still
immobile and dumbfounded after Sam walked away. His one kiss has the ability to
cause a short circuit in my heart. It’s usually just a brief flicker, but this
time I am struggling to turn the lights back on.

My surge protector must have kicked in and I was finally able to move
again. I trudged my way back to the apartment, still slightly in a daze. By
some miracle, my arrival is greeted with the simple silence of an empty living
room. They all had things to do today; everyone except me. Not that I mind, the
last thing I am ready to do is deal with my attitude from earlier and having to
apologize. That I will handle tomorrow. For now, I needed some time to myself,
which would start with a nap.

Flipping from side to side, rolling to my front and then to my back, I
am unable to relax enough to fall asleep. Every time I close my eyes, bright
green ones fill the screen ahead. Sam has consumed my every thought; there was
no escaping him.

Escaping Sam would be a dream and a nightmare rolled into one. I dream
that I am able to walk away and leave my feelings buried deep in the sand, but
the nightmare begins as I turn back to see him standing at water’s edge, not
coming after me, leaving me alone and without him.

A life without Sam just doesn’t make sense. However, the harsh reality
is, it was an all or nothing situation. I’m not able to just be friends with
someone who pulls at my deepest stings.

If Sam were going to be living in Avalon, we would have to figure this
out soon.

In the meantime, I have a night to myself and plan on taking full
advantage of it. Feeling comfortable, still in my torn jeans and tank, I grab a
zip-up hoodie for when it cools down later and slip on my sneakers, planning to
keep it low-key having only a drink or two.

Recently, I have decided to cut back on my going out and drinking excessively.
History shows that all it leads to are bad choices. Alcohol lowers my
inhibitions, leading me to go home with random guys, which has gotten me
nowhere.

No more drunken hook ups. I am working towards a goal of bettering
myself and this will be the first step.

Truth
be
told, even if I did try to hook up
with someone at this point, it is not likely to work out. Last night should be
proof of that. Every kiss and touch will be compared to Sam and once that is in
my head, there isn’t an eraser big enough to wipe it away. And with only one
test subject thus far, it’s still too early to re-test my theory.

Since I know Becka and Lilly have plans tonight and Preston was already
in the bar earlier to take care of things, I shouldn’t have to worry about
running into the girls while I am at Penny’s. I suppose I could have easily
gone to another bar, but Chad is working and he always cheers me up.

Walking in tonight, reminds me of the first time we entered Penny’s a
year ago, and it was deserted. Of course, it is not as empty tonight but it’s a
far cry from what a typical Saturday night tends to look like. There wasn’t
even one of the guys out front collecting a cover fee to get in, which is
unusual.

For the past year, Friday and Saturday nights always had a cover. Not
that we have ever paid any money to get in, perks of your best friend boning
the bartender-turned-manager.

The area near the bar is mostly empty, with sparse people spread out
towards the dance floor and tables. I would guess at this point there are less
than thirty people in here. Word must have spread quickly that Knucks Road
would not be playing tonight.

Not wanting to gain attention from the few locals I recognized, I take
a seat at the bar and wait for my favorite bartender. It doesn’t take long
before he struts over, smiling. Having no shame, I don’t hide the fact that I
am checking him out and soaking in his sexiness. His biceps look like they are
about to bust out of his sleeves.

Damn.

If big, muscular guys were my
thing
, Chad
would be number one on my radar.

“Flying solo tonight?” He asks standing across from me behind the bar.

“Yeah. Why is so dead tonight?”

“This is a result of your boy cancelling tonight’s show. Must have had
something pretty important going on for him to bail last minute and promise to
give us two free shows to make up for it.”

That’s interesting. Dave said it was nothing bad, but must be
important for him to promise free gigs for canceling.

“Well, hopefully it will pick up for you guys later.”

“I hope so. There are five of us on tonight and if it stays like this
we won’t be making any money.” Chad leans forward against the bar on his
forearms, bringing himself closer to me. “On a positive note it will give me
time to focus more on you.” His blue eyes gleam in mischief and his big smile
shows of his perfect white teeth. “What can I get you?”

“I am taking it easy tonight, so just my usual cocktail for now,
please.”

“Usual cocktail?” Chad asks, looking as though he is contemplating
something. “How about we hold the tail?”

I fall out laughing. I knew I could count on Chad to improve the
downer mood I have been stuck in all day. “That’s a good one. How many times
have you used that?”

“Cheyenne, you know I save my best lines for you.” He is so full of
shit and I am not buying it.

Tilting my head, I raise my brows in doubt. “I hope that’s not your
best line.”

Although it was pretty good, and it was the first time I had heard it.

“Not even close.” Chad gets to work mixing my drink and slides it over
to me when he is finished. “Why are you taking it easy tonight? Big plans
later?”

“No plans. I just needed a night to myself, so I figured I would have
a couple drinks and then head home.”

“I got to tell you, Cheyenne, I am digging this look tonight. It took
me a minute to realize it was you when you first walked in. Those jeans fit
your ass nicely and as much as I love those short little numbers your normally
wear, this might be my new favorite look.” The thought of him checking me out
makes me giggle.

I am fairly certain this is the first time Chad has seen me in jeans,
and likely the most covered up.

“Since I don’t plan on trying to impress anyone, I felt comfort was a
good way to go. It is good to know you appreciate it though, handsome.”

“Oh, I definitely do. And it brings a shot to mind.” Chad pleads with
his eyes, slowly reaching for his shaker, waiting for my approval.

“Fine. I will do one shot. But that is it, and only if you do it with
me.” Usually it is frowned upon for employees to drink, but occasionally, and
especially when it is slower, they join the fun.

As Chad grabs the shaker to make our shot, I glance around the room. I
bet tips tonight are going to be shitty. Jonathan is working behind the bar
with Chad and there are three girls working the floor. They probably would have
been good with just one waitress.

When I turn back around, Chad has two short glasses filled with a blue
liquid. The color almost looks like the slow fuck he gave me last time, but
this one is definitely bluer. There is no telling what I am about to get. He is
always full of surprises.

“Do I even want to ask?”

“It is something I am sure you have never experienced, but you have
been the cause of, many times.”

Oh, lord.

“Blue balls.” Chad informs me straight-faced.

Tilting my head from side to side, I think on this for a minute, before
raising my glass to meet his.

“Yeah, you are probably right.” Laughing we tap our glasses and down
the sweet, raspberry flavored liquid.

“Hey Chad, can you go in the back and bring me out another case of
Miller?” Jonathan hollers from down the bar. “Oh, hey Cheyenne!”

I wave back at Jonathan with a smile. I haven’t seen much of him
lately, since he cut back his hours this semester.

“Yeah,” Chad answers, before turning back to me. “Since I am still
technically the new guy, I get all the bitch work. I will be right back.”

As Chad walks toward the back stock room, I find my eyes traveling to view
his ass. He has a very nice one, but still doesn’t hold a candle to Sam. I am
ruined for life.

In the process of pulling my phone out to send Sam a text, I feel
someone sit down next to me. I am pretty sure the only reason I am able to feel
said person is because they slid the stool so close, that it is practically
touching mine.

Have I mentioned
that I am the only person at the bar?

There is plenty of space to sit elsewhere. Without looking over, I can
already sense a bad vibe and I am so not in the mood for whoever this is. My
period must be coming, because I am growing moodier by the second and have not
patience.

“Hey, stranger.” My skin crawls, just hearing Sean’s voice.

What was I thinking the night I went home with him? It is times like
that, which make me really contemplate ever drinking again.

“Here all by your lonesome?” He asks, laying his hand on my thigh,
sliding it up before I slap it away.

Not happening buddy.

“Let’s just go ahead and get this out there,” I start, turning so he
can see how serious I am, “I’m not interested.”
 
I say, trying to smile sweetly, even though
he basically creeps me out.

Again, he is dressed in khakis and a crisp polo, with his dark hair
parted to the side and slicked down. Taking a good, sober look at him, he
really isn’t that attractive. His nose is pointier than a man’s should be. His
dark brown eyes appear beady and he has thinnest little bird lips.

Gross.

Not to mention to wretched smell of whiskey on his breath is so strong
that I wouldn’t doubt if it is also seeping from his pores.

“Now, c’mon. We both know that’s not true.”
 
He goes to move his hand back on my leg
and I jump off the stool.

“Sorry, but it is very true. If you will excuse me, I need to use the
ladies room.”

Before he can say anything else, I walk off in the direction of the
bathroom. Hopefully when I walk back out he will be gone. I hate guys who can’t
take a hint

 
The fact that I never once
tried to contact him after our one night – one minute adventure –
together, should be clue enough for this guy.

I take my time, checking my reflection in the mirror, and even browsing
my phone to stall my return as long as possible.

My inbox sadly has no new messages and as much as I want to text Sam
and finish what was started at the park earlier, I think better of it and store
my phone back inside my bag.

I also have the urge to text Dave and check in with him to make sure
that everything is, in fact, all right with him. He said he would fill me in
tomorrow, so I should probably just wait it out. I will text him in the morning
when I wake up and hopefully he will be available to grab lunch.

My list of texts tomorrow will also include my
step-brother
.
I am counting on the whole, no news is good news, but I would feel better
knowing one way or another.

Of course I will also be apologizing to Sawyer tomorrow, for being
such an asshole today. We have been friends long enough that she is probably
just as in tune with my cycle as she is with her own. I think she will
understand.

After a few long minutes, I emerge from the bathroom relieved to see
the bar is empty once again. Returning to my seat, I am also thankful that Chad
is back from his bitch work.

“Hey, Jon said it looked like some dude was bothering you. You okay?”
He asks, his baby blues full of concern.

“Yeah, nothing I can’t handle.” I blow it off like it isn’t a big
deal, but I feel slightly uneasy about the interaction.

Picking up my glass, I bring it to my lips and finish drinking the
remainder. An involuntary chill runs down my back from the strong taste.

“Another?”

“Yeah, how about just a single this time and a water if you don’t mind,
please?”

This will max me out for my low-key limit, and I will probably give it
another half hour and call it a night.

“Sure thing, little lady.” Chad says, as he fills a glass with ice
water. “Do me one favor though, let me take you home when you are ready. I
don’t want you walking by yourself.”

I have a witty comeback on the tip of my tongue for his comment on
taking me home, but it dies out when I take in the sincerity on his face. “Okay,
sounds good. Thanks.”

The beats of my favorite song flow through the speakers, and seeing a
few girls I know already on the floor, I jump up from my seat. “I just want to go
say hi and dance a little, then I will be ready to leave.” I say smiling and
handing Chad my bag to store behind the bar.

“I’ll let Jonathan know that I am cutting out early since it’s been a
quiet night here. He can handle it himself. I’ll come grab you in a few when I
am done closing out.”