Handful of Heaven (11 page)

“That’s a good place.” Cal dropped onto his chair and bowed his head for a quick prayer. As soon as “Amen” was muttered, he grabbed his fork and dug in. “If I were you, I’d pick an even better place. Classier. Mrs. McKaslin’s pretty swift. She’ll like something real nice.”

“That place is nice.”

“Yeah, but you’re serious, so you have to let her know right up front.”

“I never said I was serious.”

“Dad, look at her.” Cal gestured to the cash register where Paige greeted the newly arrived Corey family. Three generations of them crowded around the counter, as Paige chatted amicably with Mrs. Corey.

Paige. Her loveliness stunned him. Evan couldn’t explain what happened in his heart as he looked at her. Yes, she was sure something. It had taken him a decade to notice, but he was finally ready, and he
was
noticing.

She’d changed into dry clothes, something she might have had on hand, he suspected, for the jeans peering out from beneath her crisp ruffled green apron were wash-worn, and it was a high-school sweatshirt she wore. Her hair was curlier than usual, probably from the rain and wind, and every time he looked at her she became more beautiful. Not in a cool, distant kind of way, but he noticed warmth and heart in her that he’d never taken the time to notice before.

His son’s words haunted him. Serious. Am I serious about her?

How could he not be?

“Look, Dad, a friend of mine works at this great restaurant in Bozeman. I’ll give her a call, get you a cool table, and on the way home we’ll stop by and get some flowers.”

“Flowers?” He had a hard time focusing on anything because Paige was coming his way, leading the Corey family down the aisle, chatting with Mrs. Corey over her shoulder as she went. Paige was elegance and she fascinated him.

On the way past his table, she surprised him by flashing him a warm knowing smile. One that made his soul lurch. One that made him feel alive all over again.

“Dad? You are one sorry dude. But it’s gonna be okay. I’m gonna take care of you. Help you out with this.”

Evan tried to focus on his son and had a hard time doing it. “Help? Nah, I got this all wrapped up. You need to study for your chem test.”

“Dad.” Cal shook his head like a parent who knows best when confronting a clueless teenager. “You have
so
much to learn. It’s a good thing you have me. Who knew all my dating expertise was going to pay off? Now, what is it you’re always telling me? Respect the girl. Mind your manners. Be a gentleman. I don’t have to tell you what that means, do I?”

Evan felt his face burn. “No, I think we can safely say that I’ll be a perfect gentleman. Let me think. I’m trying to remember why I was glad you came home? All that quiet I’ve been enjoying sounds good about now.”

“Yeah, yeah. Face it, Dad. You need me.” Cal stuffed a forkful of waffle into his mouth, enjoying this way too much.

Evan’s gaze roamed across the dining room to where Paige was helping elderly Mrs. Corey into a chair and when Mr. Corey insisted that was his job, Paige simply melted.

In that brief moment he saw something new about her. Paige McKaslin was an old-fashioned girl.

Well, she was in luck, because he was a hold-the-door, treat-a-woman-right, old-fashioned kind of guy.

“M
om, you’re gonna be late for your date!” Alex’s voice echoed down the long hallway. “Mom!”

“I’m in here.” She checked her reflection in the big beveled mirror over her dresser.

The woman who gazed back at her looked ready for a meal at a fine restaurant. Her hair was tidy, her jewelry sedate—except for her earrings, maybe those were too much. And maybe the black rayon jacket and pants set made her look too severe. She had time. She should pick something else. There was that pretty pink dress she’d worn at Easter, and it had been a flattering color on her.

No, I’m not going to be one of those women who dress to suit some man, she told herself firmly. This is just dinner. Just a thank-you for all he’s done. He’s a customer. He’s a man. He’s not really interested in me.

But am I interested in him? She couldn’t quite answer that question truthfully, and she was glad for the interruption of her son bounding through her open bedroom door, looking windswept and bright-eyed. “What have you been up to?”

“No good.” With a wide grin, he dropped into the overstuffed chair by the picture window. “You know me. Robbing banks. Holding up old ladies.”

“Sure. Did you play basketball at the church?”

“When it finally stopped raining. I told Beth to stop by the diner tomorrow on her way to school. She has work release so she doesn’t have to be there until noon.”

“I never said I’d hire her.” Paige decided black was the perfect color for a woman with a teenage son who had a girlfriend. The perfect color for a woman who was not going to believe in love again. The perfect color to remind her that this dinner wasn’t a genuine date. “And before you say anything, I am shorthanded, but I can’t hire her just because you like her.”

“There’s a reason I like her, Mom. She’s a good person.” Her teenaged boy flashed her a telling look. “Isn’t that what you always say is important?”

Paige rolled her eyes. “Aren’t you supposed to be doing something? Your homework, maybe?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll get to it. What I need to do—” he rose up to his full six-foot height, “is help my mommy get ready to go out with her new boyfriend.”

That he seemed pleased with the idea only made her laugh. Laughing covered up her embarrassment. She snapped the back off her left earring. “If I ever hear you say
boyfriend
again, you’ll be grounded so fast, it’ll make your head spin.”

“Ooh, I’m afraid.” With a wink he caught her hand. “Leave the earrings. They’re pretty. Just like you.”

Her heart melted. “You stop trying to charm me.”

“It’s just the truth, Mom.” Sincerity shone in his eyes, as blue as hers, when their gazes met in the mirror. “Cal told me his dad’s like
waaay
serious about you. And I figure, this’ll be good for ya. Get out. Be with a nice guy your own age. I raised ya right. I trust ya.”

Before she could begin to figure out what on earth she should say to that, the doorbell chimed. Nerves skidded through her like cold ice. Her fingertips felt frozen as if she’d been hours out in the cold and she had a tough time getting the earring back on.

“That’ll be him.” With a delighted grin, Alex dashed from the room.

Paige gripped the edge of the dresser, holding on for dear life as her son’s words replayed in her head.
Cal told me his dad’s like
waaay
serious about you.

That can’t be right, can it? Paige clicked on the earring back.
And if it is, oh, Lord, what am I going to do?
Because she had mentally prepared herself to have a friendly conversation over a meal with Evan. To keep her shields up and her hopes, as tiny as they were, securely in place. What she wasn’t ready for was a big first step on a path that was uncertain and risky.

No, she told herself firmly, Alex’s words were nothing more than the result of two boys speculating on their parents’ relationship. It was nothing to worry about. She took a steadying breath, heard the front door close and the rumble of male voices in conversation. It looked like Evan was waiting for her, so she grabbed her evening bag and headed down the hall. She was ready for a casual, friendly dinner. She wouldn’t think about the rest.

“Evan.” His name spilled from her lips at the sight of the fit and handsome man standing in her foyer, wearing a striking black suit and coordinating black tie, and holding a vase of long-stemmed red roses. There were so many perfect buds, she could smell the beautiful old-fashioned aroma as she stumbled the last few yards down the hallway. “Oh, you brought flowers.”

“You like ’em?”

“Y-yes. Thank you.” The flowers were exquisite, but it was the man who captivated her. The man whose dark eyes widened with visible appreciation as she stepped into the fall of the overhead light. His was no casual look, but one that frightened her for all its sincerity and warmth. She saw the man’s steady heart and kind nature in the slow sweep of his smile.

“Paige. You look beautiful.”

The way he said it, made her think that he believed it. She couldn’t remember any man who’d ever said that to her. It wasn’t true, and she couldn’t let herself read anything into his misguided belief, but deep down, it mattered. She knew she was beaming as she smiled at him. “You brought me flowers?”

“I was told by my son it is important to make the right impression. How am I doing?”

Wonderful. “Passable.”

Alex stepped in to take the flowers. “That means she’s pleased. You two have a nice time. Drive safe. Oh, and Mom, don’t forget you have a curfew.”

“You are enjoying this way too much, young man.” Her hand shook as she reached into the hall closet for her Sunday-best coat. “I want all your homework done before you turn on the TV.”

“Roger, captain.” He disappeared into the kitchen. “Call if you’re gonna be late. You know the rules.”

Thank heavens for her son. She was chuckling instead of trembling as she slipped her arm into her coat sleeve and missed. She was rattled, that was all. More nervous than she expected to be. The evening had turned more serious than she had imagined.

“Let me.” Evan was there, a big powerful presence behind her, holding her coat so she could try again. He was so close she could smell the pleasant spice of his aftershave. She felt small next to him, feminine and womanly, something she hadn’t felt in so long. It was as if a part of her was awakening, and there was more light for her eyes to see by and more heart for her to feel alive.

Evan settled the coat around her shoulders with care. “Since you have a curfew, we’d best get going.”

The low rumble of humor in his voice seemed to draw her closer. “I noticed Cal was with you at the diner. What does he think of this?”

Evan held the door for her. “I didn’t get a curfew, but I have to call him with a report as soon as I get home. He tried to give me advice. He thought I needed it.”

“Do you?”

“Considering I haven’t dated for two whole decades, I think that’s a yes.” Evan shut the door and followed her down the steps. “Cal gave me advice all day long. When he stopped, Phil called in with even more advice.”

“So, how does everyone know about this?”

Evan opened the passenger door for her. “I’m sure my son is to blame. I’ll beat him thoroughly the next time I see him.”

“Yeah, I’m sure you will.” Paige didn’t look as if she believed it for a second.

And she would be right. He took her elbow as she climbed up into the cab, and he could feel her muscles tense beneath the layers of clothes. She was small-boned, hardly anything at all to her, he realized, and a hard surge swelled through him, bringing with it the need to protect her. To take care of her.

Strong needs for so early in the game. He didn’t trust feelings, and so he did his best to hold them back as he closed her door and circled around to the driver’s side.

He had to be careful. This was how it had all gone wrong with Liz, or at least that was his theory. He’d been overwhelmed with those strong male traits to love and protect. Liz wanted to be taken care of and he wanted to love and protect her.

He’d fallen too hard too fast, and he hadn’t noticed the small signs and clues along the way until she had his ring on her finger and it was way too late to step back.

He had to tread carefully. He would not make that mistake again.

Had she ever been so nervous in her entire life? If she had, Paige couldn’t remember when. It wasn’t like her at all. She was never rattled. She was a single parent, a business owner and responsible for her employee’s salaries every month. She couldn’t afford to be anything but rock-solid.

It was Evan. He was putting her right out of her comfort zone.

And to make matters worse, he kept getting the doors for her. Didn’t he know she was perfectly capable of getting them for herself?

She walked through the heavy wood-and-glass doors to one of the nicest restaurants in the area. Evan’s hand settled on her shoulder as he followed her into the lobby. The lights were low, and restful piano music added a tasteful background. The décor was Western and expensive.

Nice place. A fire crackled in the central stone fireplace in the dining area of high-backed booths and the firelight reflected in the long row of windows that overlooked the spectacular mountains.

A hostess tended to them immediately and Paige managed what she hoped was a composed appearance as she followed the college-age girl past the fireplace to a window table. Tucked in the corner, it was cozy and private and offered a stunning view of the up close Bridger Peaks and the rugged Rocky Mountains. The pewter sky was swept with broad strokes of magenta and gold from the setting sun.

Evan had pulled out all the stops. There was no possible way she could call this a casual friendly meal, not considering this elegant restaurant. He held out a chair for her, indicating she should take the better view. Wordless, she slipped into the chair and the solid warmth of his presence so undeniably close had her trembling all over again.

She wasn’t prepared for this. Not at all. But she didn’t want to stop it from happening, either.

Evan seated himself across the table, and while she accepted the menu from the hostess and tried to concentrate on the specials, she felt as if the room were spinning. Alex’s words kept replaying in her head.
Cal told me his dad’s like
waaay
serious about you.
Why had the boy told her that? She didn’t want to hear things like that! She felt as if she were standing on the edge of a tall cliff with the earth crumbling away around her feet.

As soon as the hostess stepped away from their table, Evan leaned closer. “Did you happen to catch what she was saying?”

“No,” she confessed. “I was too blown away by the view to listen very well.”

Not exactly the truth, but she didn’t feel comfortable confessing just how anxious she was. Would he understand? He looked sure and confident, as always. The menu he held open in his wide, capable hands was steady, unlike hers. This dating thing is for the birds, she decided. Why on earth would anybody do this to themselves?

Evan studied her with a small smile, as if he had a secret. “The view? I didn’t notice. All I can see is you.”

The air evaporated from her lungs. Her heart forgot to beat. Thought fled from her poor befuddled brain. This was not friendship; this was not safe ground. The earth was crumbling faster around her metaphorical feet, and she didn’t like knowing she was about to fall.

“Cal said the steaks here are great.” Evan kept talking, his tone calm and steady and everything a dream man should be. “That’s not the exact words. I think he said they were awesome.”

Their boys. This was safe ground; safe conversation. She groped for what normalcy she could. “How is your son liking MSU?”

“Cal’s thriving. Busy. Wasn’t homesick for a minute. He got a good roommate in the dorms, and he’s made friends. I think he manages to study in there some time. Actually, he’s doing well. Growing up and away.”

“Kids tend to do that. Alex is going to be spending the summer working as a camp counselor up near Glacier National Park. And so after this graduation, I’ll be sending him off into the world. Now that it’s getting closer, I don’t think I’m going to like that as much as I always thought.”

“I know what you mean. I raised my boys to be good men. They are. I’m proud of them. But they were my life.”

“As they should be.” They had this in common. Not only were they the ones in their marriages who had stayed the course, they were also the ones who had had the reward of spending their lives day by day with their children.

That’s what real love was, the holding on when it was hard to do so. Evan had a steadfast heart. And, after feeling the sting of a husband who’d bailed, there was nothing more important to her in a man.

A perky waitress arrived, obviously a college girl from the nearby campus, who introduced herself as Caitlin. Fortunately, she repeated the specials for Evan, who considered the choices and indicated that Paige should order first.

She chose the smallest steak, thinking the less food, the quicker the meal would be finished and the sooner she could get this over with. A suffocating ache had dug in deep in the center of her chest. An ache that was pure emotion, a little of the past hurting, and mostly fears she could not put into words. They were fears she didn’t want to acknowledge.

While Evan ordered one of the evening’s special Angus steaks, Paige watched the sunset. The pewter clouds turned nearly purple as the last of the light burned into the glacial peaks of the Rockies. It was stunningly beautiful, but she felt a little like that sun slipping into the unseen beyond and treading in unfamiliar country.

Relationships—even a first date—required vulnerability. Exposing an honest piece of who you really are to another person. She’d done that once, and gotten burned where she was most fragile. She’d decided long ago that nothing—
nothing
—could ever be worth the risk of hurting like that.