How to Make Love All Night (and Drive Your Woman Wild) (And Drive a Woman Wild : Male Multiple Orgasm and Other Secrets for Prolonged Lovemaking) (12 page)

BOOK: How to Make Love All Night (and Drive Your Woman Wild) (And Drive a Woman Wild : Male Multiple Orgasm and Other Secrets for Prolonged Lovemaking)
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No Cheating, Please

Before we get started, let me stress one last time that the techniques presented in this chapter require a powerful PC

muscle that is under your control. This is especially true for the one-shot technique. You also need to be very confident in your ability to peak and/or plateau at very high arousal levels.

I can appreciate the fact that you want to get to the good stuff, and I applaud your enthusiasm. It must be hard
not
to rush when nirvana awaits, but this is another instance in which rushing can ruin sex.

My grandfather used to say, “It’s hard to reach nirvana if the tires on the bus don’t have enough air.” (I guess you can understand why he and my grandmother got along so well.) Please take a moment right now to “check your tires.” Please examine how diligent you have been following the exercise regimen until this point. Be honest with yourself. If you are the least bit unsure about how thorough you’ve been, now is the time to go back to the earlier exercises and really give it your all.

There is only one shortcut in this book, and that’s the one you’re about to learn. If you have tried to cut corners with any of the previous exercises, you are going to be very frustrated and disap-

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pointed when you attempt the exercises in this chapter.

Achieving male multiple orgasm is easy if you do the work, but if you don’t do the work, it usually doesn’t happen.

The Shot Heard Round the World

Exercises 13 and 14 were developed by Dr. Michael Riskin through his work with hundreds of men at the Riskin-Banker Psychotherapy Center. He has spent many years refining and perfecting his techniques, and I am happy to be able to present them here. Even if this method doesn’t work for you, it’s fun to try. So go for it. Exercise 14 is done without a partner.

Exercise 13: Doc Riskin’s Magic Motion (with a partner) This exercise begins with the man lying on his back. Your partner begins by giving you a genital caress with her hands and/or mouth. Let your arousal build. The first thing you are going to do is peak at Level 4. When you reach Level 4, let your partner know. She should stop the stimulation and let you drop a couple of levels. Use your PC to help control the situation.

Ask your partner to resume the stimulation. When you reach Level 5, let her know. She should stop again and let you drop a couple of levels. Use your PC if you need to. Now start again and do a peak to Level 6. It should take between three and five minutes to complete each peak. If you want to

128 / BARBARA KEESLING, PH.D.

take more time, stretch your peaks into plateaus using the techniques we practiced in the previous chapter.

At this point you are going to get into the position we have been using for intercourse. You should be feeling pretty aroused right now, and you probably have at least a partial erection if not a full erection.

Insert your penis into your partner and begin slowly thrusting. You should be taking slow, focused, deep breaths the entire time. Focus on what you are feeling. Focus on every thrust. Your partner should also be focusing on the thrusts and focusing on her feelings.

TROUBLESHOOTING TIP: The two of you are in this together. If your partner is counting the cracks in the ceiling, it defeats the whole purpose of these techniques.

Only practice the partner exercises when both of you are really into it. If you want to practice and she doesn’t, fly solo.

Peak up to Level 7. When you reach Level 7, either slow down or stop thrusting until your arousal drops a couple of levels. Stay in the moment. Now resume or accelerate your thrusting and peak up to Level 8. Let your arousal drop a couple of levels once again. Next, peak up to Level 9. Then drop down yet again. You may prefer to take more time by stretching these peaks into longer plateaus.

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Now here’s the tricky part. This time you are going to resume thrusting past Level 9, all the way to your point of inevitability. (Remember that’s the psychological point where it becomes clear to you that ejaculation is going to happen, no matter what.)
As soon as you hit your point of no return,
squeeze your PC muscle as hard as you can for ten seconds and
open your eyes. Take a really deep breath. Now keep thrusting!

Don’t stop!

TROUBLESHOOTING TIP: Most people instinctively close their eyes as they approach orgasm. To make this technique work, you
must
open your eyes during the PC squeeze. I don’t know why. All I know is that it doesn’t work if you keep your eyes closed. Keeping the eyes open is the part of this technique that men are most likely to forget.

If you can do all of these things simultaneously, your body is going to go into orgasm at this very moment. Your heart will pound, you’ll sweat, and your muscles will contract. All of the sensations of at least a partial, if not a full, orgasm will be there.
But you will not ejaculate
. Your PC has stopped your ejaculation while still allowing your body to go into orgasm.

Once you’ve experienced this partial or full orgasm you need to slow down for a while. Relax for a few seconds—you’ve earned it. You can continue thrusting, but it shouldn’t be vigorous.

130 / BARBARA KEESLING, PH.D.

Instead, begin some real slow, easy thrusting accompanied by some slow breathing.

Right now you’re probably marveling at the fact that you’ve just had an orgasm and you’re still thrusting. Your partner is probably marveling at it too. Pat yourself on the back. Pat each other on the back. Pat each other anywhere you want. But remember, we’re not done yet. One down, one to go.

Once you are in control of your breathing again, it’s time to start back toward the top. Slowly increase the speed of your thrusting. Keep your focus. Let your arousal level rise once more. If you want to do more peaks or plateaus, go ahead. But at this point you may prefer to just let yourself go straight to the top. (Please note that at this point you simply are learning to have two orgasms in a single session of intercourse. In chapter 11 we will talk more about length-ening the amount of time between orgasms, having more than two orgasms, etc.)

When you feel your orgasm coming on once again, don’t try to manipulate it. Don’t try to stop your ejaculation this time. You’ve done enough work for one day. Focus fully on the sensations of your arousal, and let yourself have a second climax—ejaculation and all.

Now you really need to congratulate yourself and each other.
You have just had your first multiple orgasm
.

I suspect that one of the reasons why the one-shot method doesn’t work for every man is because, as you may have already discovered, it is hard to do. There are so many things to coordinate, particularly at the point where you have to squeeze your

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PC, take a deep breath, open your eyes, and keep thrusting—all at the same time. That’s harder than learning to play the piano.

The good news is that your partner can be extremely helpful here. If she is keeping pace with you, her actions can reinforce your actions. It helps a lot if she takes a deep breath when you take a deep breath. It helps if she keeps moving as a reminder for you to keep moving. And if she opens her eyes and sees that you haven’t opened yours, she can tell you.

One and a Half Orgasms Are Better Than One Some men have two full orgasms the first time they try the one-shot technique. Some men cannot work with this method at all. But most men fall some-where in between. For these men, the first few attempts at mastering the one-shot technique yield some unusual results.

Whether you are practicing the one-shot technique or the second, more conservative method, which will be presented shortly, you are likely to experience any number of new and/or unusual sensations before you have your first true multiple orgasm. For example:

• You may feel like you missed an orgasm.

• You may have a partial orgasm that isn’t terribly impressive.

• You may have a partial ejaculation without an orgasm after you have your first orgasm.

132 / BARBARA KEESLING, PH.D.

All of these responses are completely normal. There is absolutely nothing to worry about. In fact, these seemingly strange physiological experiences are all clear signs that you are on your way to having your first full multiple orgasm.

Did you hear that? These are
good
signs, not bad signs.
Most
men who are learning to become multiorgasmic have at least one of these unusual responses before their techniques really

“click.” It’s all part of the process. If you aren’t expecting it, it can be kind of scary. But if you are expecting it, it’s positive reinforcement.

So put away your worry beads, cancel your appointment with the urologist, and get back to work. Your first
full
multiple orgasm awaits…and it won’t be long now.

Last-Minute Jitters Before the Big Debut?

Having your first multiple orgasm is a very big deal. Some men want to share every moment of it with their partners whereas other men get a little nervous and prefer to gain some mastery over these techniques before they host their first coming-out party. Like most of the exercises in this book, the one-shot method can be learned with or without a partner. It’s really up to you and your partner to decide whether or not your first multiple orgasm will be a private event or a semiprivate event (though I discourage you from trying to sell the rights to pay-per-view).

If you are feeling a bit nervous about having your first multiple orgasm, Exercise 14 will teach

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you how to master the one-shot technique without a partner.

Once you’ve had a few multiple orgasms on your own and you’re feeling more confident, you can then return with your partner to Exercise 13.

Even if you have your first multiple orgasm with your partner, you may want to practice the one-shot technique on your own at some point. If this is the case, Exercise 14 is the exercise for you. Many men like to practice without a partner and some wouldn’t have it any other way. This doesn’t mean they don’t love their partners. It just means they’re driven to excel. One client recently told me, “Practicing on my own was an essential part of learning the fine points of my personal response. I have incredible control now. I think it would have been much harder to develop that if I was always doing this with my partner.” As always, your approach to learning these techniques is a choice for you and your partner to make.

There is no right or wrong way.

Exercise 14: One-Man Mission to Mars (solo) This exercise begins like a peaking exercise. Using plenty of lubrication, begin stroking your penis. Feel your arousal level start to rise. The first thing you want to do is peak at Level 4 using your PC muscle (the way you did in Exercises 4 and 5). After you have dropped a couple of levels, intensify your stimulation and do a peak at Level 6. Once again, use your PC muscle to control your peak. Next, peak at Level 8. Then at Level 9. Take your

134 / BARBARA KEESLING, PH.D.

time. These first four peaks should take at least fifteen or twenty minutes to complete. (If you want to take even more time, try to plateau at each of these levels.) What you are going to do now is really push this peaking exercise. Intensify your stimulation once again and peak to Level 9.5. Use your PC muscle to stop your arousal from increasing. You need to be really in control of your body to do this. You’re getting very close to the top now and the temptation to let yourself go and have an orgasm is enorm-ous. Hang in there if you can. It won’t be long now.

Your final peak is going to be at the point of inevitability—your psychological point of no return where ejaculation feels imminent. Talk about dancing on the volcano. This is the toughest peak you’ll ever climb.

You have to be totally tuned in to your body right now.

You’re going to be stroking your penis intensely, heading right toward ejaculation. But the
moment
you reach your point of inevitability—not one second later, but at that very moment—you want to slam on the PC muscle.
Keep stroking
your penis just as fast as you’ve been stroking up to this point.
Take a really deep breath
. Now
open your eyes
and keep them open. Hold your PC muscle as tight as you can for about
ten seconds
.

Whew…I get exhausted just describing it. If you can do all of these things at your point of inevitability, what will happen here is that your body will go into orgasm. But if you’ve squeezed hard enough and long enough with your PC,
you will not ejaculate
.

HOW TO MAKE LOVE ALL NIGHT / 135

TROUBLESHOOTING TIP: It may sound silly, but you must open your eyes the moment you start your PC squeeze to make this technique work. Besides, this is an event you don’t want to miss.

Take a deep breath again. Slow down the stimulation and let your arousal dip down to Level 8 or Level 7. You’re going to be very tired at this point, and probably pretty sweaty.

But you’re not far from having your first multiple orgasm.

Once you’ve “rested” for a moment, intensify your stimulation once again. Let your arousal level rise. But this time, you don’t want to get in the way. You don’t want to squeeze your PC muscle and you don’t want to slow your motion.

All you want to do is let yourself have a full orgasm, complete with ejaculation. And that, my friend, is a multiple orgasm.

I have said it before but I need to say it again. The first few times you try an exercise like this you may experience any number of unusual sensations, such as a partial orgasm or a “skipped” orgasm. These things may not feel very normal but they all
are
very normal, and there is no reason to be concerned. Your body is learning something new, and these are all encouraging signs of your development. So don’t worry…be happy.

One other thing. Please remember that this technique does not work for every man. It is difficult to coordinate so many important actions at the exact

136 / BARBARA KEESLING, PH.D.

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