How to Make Love All Night (and Drive Your Woman Wild) (And Drive a Woman Wild : Male Multiple Orgasm and Other Secrets for Prolonged Lovemaking) (9 page)

BOOK: How to Make Love All Night (and Drive Your Woman Wild) (And Drive a Woman Wild : Male Multiple Orgasm and Other Secrets for Prolonged Lovemaking)
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Make sure
all
your muscles are completely relaxed. Great.

You have just had a “peak” at Level 6.

You are going to continue this exercise for the next fifteen to twenty minutes. What I want you to do is try to have a peak at Level 4, Level 6, Level 7, Level 8, and Level 9, which is the point just prior to your “point of no return.” At each level it’s important to stop the stimulation, relax, take a really deep breath, and make sure all of your muscles are relaxed.

Always let yourself drop at least one level, preferably two, after each peak.

TROUBLESHOOTING TIP: Try not to bring your arousal up in a spike, like shooting from a Level 3 to a Level 8. You’re trying to stretch out your arousal into an extended series of gradually increasing peaks. If you were going to graph your arousal, it would look like a wave, not like a needle.

Don’t rush your peaks. Each up and down cycle should take four or five minutes. Stretch them out. Let them build slowly and savor each one. As your

HOW TO MAKE LOVE ALL NIGHT / 91

peaks get higher and higher, it may become more and more difficult to relax. One way to overcome this is by taking deeper and deeper breaths at each level. If all of this stimulation has made you need to ejaculate, go ahead. Otherwise, you can stop the exercise once you’ve completed four or five peaks. If you don’t get up to Level 8 or Level 9 the first time, that’s okay; you will with practice.

Ultimately, you will need to be able to peak at very high levels. This is not hard once you get used to the whole process of peaking. Through repetition you will learn to recognize and become comfortable at your different levels. Believe it or not, it won’t be long before you can even differentiate between Levels 8, 8.5, 9, and 9.5. Talk about knowing your own body! This kind of fine sensitivity to your arousal will make multiple orgasm a snap.

Exercise 7: Twin Peaks (with a partner)

Would you like to practice “peaking” with your partner?

Here’s how. First, you need to lie on your back, close your eyes, and get very comfortable. Your partner is going to begin the exercise by doing a sensate focus genital caress. She should do this nice and slow and focus on her own pleasure.

She can use her hands, her mouth, or both. All you should focus on is what you are feeling. This keeps the pressure off both of you.

Once she has started, your partner should say to you, “As I am stroking you, let me know if you reach the point that you think is a Level 4.” It doesn’t matter how much time it takes. Enjoy her caresses. All you need to do is simply say

“4” when you have

92 / BARBARA KEESLING, PH.D.

reached that level. Once you say “4,” your partner should stop her caress. Check all of your muscles to make sure they are relaxed. Take a deep breath, and let your arousal drop one or two levels. When your arousal has dropped off suffi-ciently, let your partner know she can start again. It helps to have agreed on a signal ahead of time, such as a nod, a wink, or a U.S. Air Force thumbs up.

Your partner should start the stimulation again very slowly, in a very focused fashion. She will then say, “Let me know when you reach a Level 6.” Enjoy her stimulation until you reach Level 6. Take your time. Then, when you reach Level 6, let her know by saying “6.” She should stop the stimulation immediately for at least several seconds. Take a deep breath, make sure all of your muscles are relaxed, and let yourself drop down a couple of levels. Once you have dropped and are ready to start up again, give her the signal to resume.

Continuing in this fashion, try to reach Level 7, Level 8, Level 9, and Level 10, if possible. You may skip a level or two if you wish. Depending on how you are feeling during this exercise you may or may not feel like going all the way to orgasm. If you don’t want to, stop the exercise at Level 8, or the level of your choice. The most important thing is not to pressure yourself.

It doesn’t matter how high you are able to go right now.

All that matters is that you are learning to listen to your body.

If you would rather stay at the lower levels for a while, that’s fine. If you want to go all the way to Level 10 and have an orgasm, that’s great too. It’s important to know that it’s entirely up to you. You should be able to ask your-HOW TO MAKE LOVE ALL NIGHT / 93

self, “What do I want today?” Remember, this is for your pleasure.

If you really take your time you can stretch this exercise out to an hour or so. To make it an even nicer experience for both of you, you may want to begin by giving your partner a genital caress. If she wants to, she could even learn to have her own peaks.

TROUBLESHOOTING TIP: Please note that it is possible to “overpeak.” If you hit more than three or four really high peaks in one session, you may find yourself temporarily unable to ejaculate. Don’t get scared, and don’t call 911. You haven’t done anything wrong. I call this phenomenon “penis burnout.” It may feel a bit weird, but it does not last. All you need to do is stop the exercise for ten minutes or so and everything should return to normal.

Onward and Upward?

By the time you have completed the exercises in this chapter a few times, you are going to have a much more sophisticated sense of your own arousal. That’s really important. If your partner has done these exercises with you, she too will be tuned into your body much more intimately. The more she knows your peaks, the more she can get involved later on, and that makes it more exciting for both of you.

94 / BARBARA KEESLING, PH.D.

Practice these exercises as much as needed to get truly comfortable with your different levels. Remember that having an orgasm is not your goal. Don’t feel like you have to climax every time or
any
time you do the exercise. Feel your way through the exercises each time. If you want to have an orgasm, let it happen. If you don’t, don’t push it. And don’t rush these exercises because you can’t wait to get to the finale.

You’ll only wind up coming back to this chapter later on.

You are building your foundation here. It has got to be solid.

So take your time; you’ll be on the roof soon enough.

Once you’ve learned your scales you are ready to move on to the next chapter. While some men are eager to continue, some may care to linger. If you’re having so much fun you don’t want to leave this chapter, feel free to hang out here for a while and refine your sensitivity. After all, you can never be too aware of your own arousal. But do remember that there’s a lot more waiting for you when you turn the page.

C H A P T E R E I G H T

ORGASM, EJACULATION,

AND YOU

95

HOW TO MAKE LOVE ALL NIGHT / 97

L
earning to become multiorgasmic is like following a recipe for some very exotic dessert. Before you can make the dessert, all of the ingredients must be available. Chapters 6

and 7 helped us to find and prepare some of the most important “ingredients” for this very special recipe. You’ve learned about the PC muscle, the key ingredient, and hopefully you are getting yours strong and ready even as we speak. You’ve learned about sensate focus, demand-free interaction, and the point of no return. You’ve discovered the many levels of your own arousal and the pleasure of peaking at these levels.

Now we’re ready to take out the mixing bowls and start combining some of our ingredients. We also have a few more items to add. I know that you are anxious to get to the crucial exercises just two chapters away, but it won’t be long now.

Any good chef will tell you that the secret to great cooking is all in the preparation. So relax, take another deep breath, and try to get the most out of these very important exercises.

Peaking with the PC Muscle

Once you have learned how to peak at various levels, you’re ready to learn how to use the PC muscle to control those peaks. A strong PC muscle works like a good set of brakes in your car. You can use it to control your arousal the way you use your brakes to control your speed, and you don’t even need a learner’s permit to start practicing.

98 / BARBARA KEESLING, PH.D.

But here’s the kicker. A strong PC can do a lot more than just control your arousal. It’s also the “brake” you will use to hold back your ejaculation while you are having an orgasm.

In the last chapter you learned how to let your arousal drop off by stopping the stimulation at each peak. In the next two exercises, you’re going to learn how to get the same results far more effectively by squeezing the PC muscle at those peaks. Learning how to use your brakes during these exercises is a little tricky. That’s because there are actually three different ways to squeeze the PC muscle when you are aroused:

• One long hard squeeze, or…

• Two medium squeezes, or…

• Several quick squeezes in a row

All three methods work, but you’ll probably find that one of them usually works best for you. Every man is different, and that means you are going to have to experiment with the different styles of squeezing to find the method that interferes least with your erection while still getting the job done.

Exercise 8 is for those men who will be working alone.

Exercise 9 is for men who are working with a partner. These exercises are very important, so take your time.

Exercise 8: King of the Road (solo)

We are going to begin this exercise the same way we started our first peaking exercise in the previous HOW TO MAKE LOVE ALL NIGHT / 99

chapter (Exercise 6: “Climbing Everest”). Lie down or sit comfortably and, using plenty of lubrication, begin a genital self-caress. Stroke your penis in a slow, gentle fashion, letting your arousal level gradually rise.

Make your first peak Level 4, a low-level peak. But this time, as you reach Level 4 you are going to
continue
stroking yourself. You are not going to stop the stimulation. Instead, what I want you to do is hit the brakes—that is, give your PC muscle one or two good strong squeezes, or three quick squeezes. Then take a very long and deep breath—lasting several seconds. Once you have done this, stop the stimulation and make sure all of your muscles are relaxed. Now let your arousal drop two levels, to a Level 2.

What you should have noticed is that even though you were still caressing yourself, the PC squeeze stopped your arousal from going any higher. It may have even taken you down one level. To drop two levels, most men need to stop the caress, which is why I ask you to stop the stimulation after your deep breath.

Let’s now try for a peak at Level 6. Start your caress and let yourself fully experience the many sensations of your arousal as your level starts to rise. When you reach a Level 6, do not stop your caress. Instead, hit the brakes again, giving your PC one or two firm squeezes, or three quickies. Take a long, deep breath. Now stop your stimulation and let yourself drop to a Level 4.

Try to continue this exercise for the next fifteen or twenty minutes, doing several more peaks. If you can, do a peak at Levels 7, 8, and 9. There are two things you need to know here:

100 / BARBARA KEESLING, PH.D.

1.
The higher you go, the longer and deeper that big breath needs to be.

2.
The higher you go, the harder you are going to have to squeeze your PC muscle.

This is especially true at the highest levels. At a Level 9, for example, you are probably going to have to give that PC

muscle one or two
really long, really hard squeezes
and you’re going to have to take a
really long, really deep breath
. Again, it’s just like driving a car. At high speeds, you’ve got to really slam on those brakes to make a quick stop. So, enjoy the drive, but don’t be afraid to really hit your PC brake when the time comes.

Exercise 9: Moonlight Drive (with a partner) Peaking with the PC muscle is a great exercise to do with a partner. To begin, lie on your back and get very comfortable.

Using plenty of lubrication, your partner should begin a genital caress. She can use manual and/or oral stimulation—whatever
she
prefers. Remember, she is doing the caress for
her
pleasure.

When you reach a Level 4 on your arousal scale, squeeze your PC muscle. Take a long, deep breath. Your PC squeeze should stop your arousal from going any higher, even though your partner has not stopped the stimulation. It could even drop you one level. Your deep breath is a signal to your partner that it is time for her to stop her caress. She should wait until the
end
of your long breath before she actually stops.

HOW TO MAKE LOVE ALL NIGHT / 101

Let your arousal drop two full levels. When you are certain you have reached a Level 2, you are ready to continue. Let your partner know that she can start her caress again.

This time, you are going to peak at Level 6. When you reach Level 6, squeeze your PC muscle. Take a long, deep breath. At the end of this breath, your partner should stop all stimulation and let you fall back down to Level 4.

Continue this exercise through Levels 7, 8, and 9. Remember that the higher you go, the harder you have to squeeze that PC muscle. Don’t be afraid to really hit those brakes—you can’t wear out the pads. That’s why you’ve been working so hard to make the muscle strong. Also, remember that the deep breath you take when you squeeze the PC needs to be longer and deeper at every level.

TROUBLESHOOTING TIP: You’re not the only one who might enjoy a few peaks. Whenever you complete a peaking session, ask your partner if she wants one of her own. Even if she doesn’t, she’ll appreciate your thoughtfulness.

A Position to Envy

Do you think you’re ready for a little more excitement? What about your partner? Is she ready too? We haven’t talked much about intercourse yet, but I think we’re ready to start talking now. Incorporat-102 / BARBARA KEESLING, PH.D.

ing intercourse into your exercise regimen is the ultimate thrill. The exercises become so exciting and so erotic you’ll have a hard time calling them exercises. But, believe it or not, they are still exercises, specifically designed to bring you closer and closer to your goal of multiple orgasm.

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