Make Every Man Want You: How to Be So Irresistible You'll Barely Keep From Dating Yourself! (2 page)
Authors: Marie Forleo
Tags: #General, #Psychology, #Self-Help, #Love & Romance, #Family & Relationships, #Interpersonal Relations, #Personal Growth, #Self-Esteem
DOI: 10.1036/0071597816
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This book is dedicated to Josh.
I love you.
There cannot be too many glorious women.
—
Marianne Williamson,
author
Part 1
Keys to Making Every Man (and Everyone Else) Want You
Chapter 2
The Five Truths That Every Irresistible Woman Needs to Know
Chapter 3
The Seven Habits of Highly Unattractive Women, or Obstacles to Making Every Man Want You
Part 2
Eight Secrets to Magnetizing Men
Chapter 4
Secret 1: To Hell with the Rules
Chapter 5
Secret 2: Trash Your Perfect Man Checklist
Chapter 6
Secret 3: When It's Men vs. Women, Everyone Loses
Chapter 7
Secret 4: Your Parents Didn't Screw You Up (and Even if They Did . . .)
Chapter 8
Secret 5: Drop Your Story
Chapter 10
Secret 7: Get a Life and Keep It, or How to Keep Him Wanting More, More, More
Chapter 12
FAQs: Twenty-One Answers to Your Most Burning Dating Dilemmas
Copyright © 2008 by Marie Forleo. Click here for terms of use
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Thank you, dear reader, for investing in this powerful and enlivening guide to unleashing your irresistibility. This book was written with your greatness in mind.
Thanks to my many teachers and mentors who have shared their wisdom through classes, books, audio programs, phone calls, and meals. I am grateful for the wisdom you have passed on and kept alive throughout the ages.
Finally, many thanks to my invaluable and loving community of family, friends, clients, and colleagues, for listening, supporting, encouraging, and cheering me on. Especially Josh Pais, Ron Forleo, Miriam Forleo, Ronny Forleo, Kelli Dalrymple, Marc Santa Maria, Donna Cyrus, Fernanda Franco, Lenore Pemberton, Caitlin Ward, Roderick Hill, TAG Online, Lynne Klippel, Deborah-Miriam Leff, Bill Gladstone, Waterside Productions, John Aherne,
McGraw-Hill, the girls (Melissa, Ginger, Simone, Tracy, Semira, Michelle, and Kristin), Monika Batista, the Tuesday Night DTW Dancers, the Crunch Dancers, Crunch Fitness, Joe Polish, Piranha Marketing, the entire Transformational Community, and, last but certainly not least, Ariel and Shya Kane—I love you guys!
Copyright © 2008 by Marie Forleo. Click here for terms of use
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What if I told you that, in about an hour, I could share information with you that could make you happier, healthier, and more attractive in a matter of minutes?
What if I told you this same information could transform the quality of your love life forever?
What if you knew the secret to being irresistibly attractive and what it takes to enjoy healthy, satisfying relationships without being manipulative or fake?
What if you didn't have to play games, follow rules, or be calculating to get what you want?
Would you be interested? Would you spend an hour or so with me? Would you like to be so damn irresistible you'll barely keep from dating yourself?
If the idea of being authentic, expressive, and irresistible is of interest to you—and I hope it is—then you are in the right place.
Make Every Man Want You
is designed to incite a complete life transformation. You'll find new possibilities
you've never before imagined at work, at play, with family and friends—and all without requiring very much effort on your part (don't you just love that?).
You may wonder about the title,
Make Every Man Want You
. You may say, "I don't want every man to want me—just one good man would be enough!" Well, I have a confession. I've whipped up an intriguing title to trick you into reading this book. You see, what you're about to learn is a radical new approach to being completely irresistible, inside and out, and how to have magnificent relationships with everyone in your life.
Some of what you are about to learn will be the complete opposite of what you have believed or been taught in the past about relationships. You have got to keep in mind that you would not be reading this book unless there was some aspect of your ability to relate that wasn't working for you.
Here is my first tip: when something does not work in your life, assume that you are operating on false information. Don't worry—this is not a problem. In fact, it is a blessing. It means you have become aware that you are off track and have already taken the first step to correct course.
With an open mind and willingness to lead an irresistible lifestyle, you're about to discover a whole new I-can't-believe-it-could-be-this-good world of love, relationship, and authentic partnership that is available and waiting for you.
This book is designed to enlighten, entertain, and transform. Where appropriate, I've included thought-provoking questions to spark insight and irresistible action challenges to help you implement this material in order to create lasting and meaningful shifts in your life.
If you'd like some extra guidance and support, I've created a free online Irresistible Action Guide that includes all the exercises in this book as well as a complimentary four-week audio coaching program to help you stay inspired and on track. Go to
makeeverymanwantyou.com
/actionguide to download these bonus resources and find more info.
Remember, reading and understanding something is light-years away from actually doing it. I could read how-to-write-a-self-help-book books all day long and understand that I need to have an idea, an outline, a computer, and a printer. But if I don't sit myself down and actually write, that self-help book will never come into existence! Same thing applies to you, dear reader. You must practice being irresistible if you really want to make every man want you. Intellectualizing is not enough.
This book is about using awareness to melt away previously hidden tendencies and behaviors that sabotage your relationships. In my experience, when you become aware of a behavior that's been getting in your way and simply notice it—without judging yourself for what you discover—that behavior melts away on its own. Nonjudgmental
awareness facilitates effortless resolution. Seeing is really enough. When you see yourself, without judgment, you dissolve the conditioning from your past.
This approach is not about setting a goal to be who you think would be a better, more irresistible you. When you set out to be better or get better, two things happen. First, you're making a blanket statement into the universe that you are broken and need fixing. This keeps you locked in a dissatisfying mental thought loop of "I'm not good enough yet." Second, you'll likely resist those habits or tendencies that your mind considers bad, and because (as you'll learn) anything we resist persists, those habits and tendencies tend to stick around. Want proof? Just take a look at how often you've made and stuck to New Year's resolutions and you'll see that the be-a-better-you approach is not extremely effective.
You may be thinking, "I'm confused. How can I notice something I'm doing to get in my own way without judging it or making a statement into the universe that something's wrong with me?" Here's how.
Adopt a gentle, inquisitive approach to self-discovery. Be innocently curious. When you see something about yourself, say, "Oh . . . interesting" or "Huh, look at that." Simply observe what exists without trying to change it. Stop pressuring yourself to embody some elusive, idealized standard you've created in your mind of the "perfect" you. Despite popular belief, you can be fully invested in growth and learning without having an underlying problem to fix.
For example, I know I'm a good dancer and I'm always willing to expand my abilities. When I find a new dance move challenging, I investigate to see if there's something I may be doing (or not doing) that's preventing me from getting the move. I try different things with my body. I may ask other dancers and teachers for help. I'm truly interested in seeing, growing, and learning. Sometimes I find the move through my own exploration; other times a fellow dancer is able to point out what I can't see on my own. Then I say, "Oh. I see now. Thanks." And that's enough. Transformation. Expansion. Growth. And all done from a spirit of self-discovery—not self-reproach.
The fastest way to see results in this or any other program is to team up with other people. Countless studies prove that those who exercise with partners tend to lose weight faster, keep it off longer, and feel more satisfied and supported in the process. Being irresistibly "in shape" is no different. When you connect with others, you drop unwanted behaviors faster, stay true to yourself more consistently, and feel a greater sense of love and support along the way.
Talk about what you learn with friends, sisters, brothers, coworkers, moms, coaches—anyone with whom you feel a special connection. The magic that is produced when two or more people come together to hold a shared vision is miraculous.
This book is yours. Use it fully. Try on the concepts. Complete every exercise. Experiment and discover your
truth. Allow the magic on these pages to support you in expressing the power, enchantment, and sensuality you have waiting inside.
The world needs that smart, funny, beautiful woman you've been dying to unleash. It's my honor to show you the way. Let's go!
Make Every Man Want You
began as a little e-book project more than six years ago. I was in my early twenties, engaged, and living with my fiancé in a tiny one-room West Village apartment in New York City. I had just started life coaching after leaving jobs on Wall Street, in fashion, and in advertising. I was eager to write a book and start making my mark on the world. What better topic than—you guessed it—women and relationships! There was only one small problem: my own relationship.
Here I was—a young, successful, attractive woman with a big diamond ring, joint bank accounts, a handsome and sweet fiancé, an entire group of friends and family excitedly looking forward to a wedding—and all I could think about was how to get the hell out of it. How could I possibly promote a book about relationships when mine was in shambles? I simply couldn't do it. The
Make Every Man Want You
e-book got pulled from the Internet and filed away on a hard drive.
Deep down, I knew I needed to get out of this engagement, but for six long months I was too scared to do it. What would I say? Where would I live? What would happen to my career? What would my parents think of me? What would everyone else think of me? What would I think of me?
With each passing day, the lie I was living grew bigger, more painful, and more overwhelming. The fights I had with my fiancé swelled to the point that it was almost unbearable to share the same space. Then one morning everything shifted. I woke up and thought, "This cannot go on for one more second. I need to end this right here and right now. My life depends on it." I can't remember exactly what I said, but I know that as soon as the words "It's over" came out of my mouth, I felt a surge of relief and exhilaration like nothing I'd ever experienced before. Of course, we cried as I handed back the ring, but deep inside I knew that this was the best decision for both of us.
Ever since that moment, things have never been the same. It's as though my soul recalibrated once I found the courage to speak my truth. I began investing in personal growth seminars and did everything I could to discover what it takes to live a truly magnificent life. I was especially interested in how to have relationships that really work and in what it takes to be fulfilled and satisfied on a consistent basis. I read tons of books, went to countless seminars, and hired the best coaches I could find. What happened next was absolutely miraculous.