Ride 'Em Cowgirl (4 page)

Stop pumping. Try the Divine Grind, keeping the head of your penis as still as you can.

Withdraw slowly. Wait till the feeling subsides—but keep stimulating her.

Change positions. Use the out-time for kissing, light spanking and even some clitoral licking.

Try a ring. Wear a penis ring to slow the approach of orgasm, as well as increase its intensity (unless you have heart problems or diabetes).

Exercise. Bulk up your PC muscle, which will give you greater control over your orgasm trigger.

Stay sober. Lay off the alcohol and drugs. These dull the self-awareness you need to recognize and pull back before that point-of-no-return.

Wrap up. Wear a condom—they’re not just for safer sex and birth control.

Be comfortably numb. Try applying a topical numbing cream to desensitize the head of your penis.

Cowgirls Only!

Cowboys: Come spy on the other team’s playbook.

Ahhh… Those first glorious moments as penis touches vagina. When every sexual sensory cell yearns to be caressed. When labia blossom like a delicate flower, enticing him inside. When the need for that exquisite feeling of fullness stimulates a deep, deep passion within.

There’s an art to intensifying these divine feelings of penetration for both you and your lover—and you’re the artist. But knowing he will experience these first few moments differently from you is the key to creating your masterpiece.

What does your lover crave? How can you heighten your own pleasure? Try any or all of these erotic moves, and feel passions rise.

Wetness: The Lube Of Love

Most guys are ready for sex at hello, which probably explains why yours may be eager to start thrusting long before you’re ready. This should come as no surprise—he’s genetically programmed that way.

But you must be physically ready, too. This means being totally, wonderfully, sensually lubricated.

If he starts his move to mount, and you’re still dry or only a little moist, let him know you’re not ready and continue foreplay until you’re naturally lubricated. Or simply reach for the sex lube and drizzle sensual slipperiness around your vagina and all over his penis. Remember: no glide—no ride!

You’ve Got To Hand It To Yourself

What could feel better than your partner’s able hand gliding the fleshy head of his penis sensually around your labia and clitoris?

YOUR hand in command.

Dr. Sadie Sez: All Out Of Sex Lube?

Then try saliva, the spreadable lube always on the tip of your tongue. While it can work well, it doesn’t last too long. So reapply as needed, or the dry friction will quickly ruin your pleasure play. Better yet, always keep a bottle of quality sex lube nearby—and apply it generously.

Slip your fingers and thumb gently around his penis, and glide its head over your lips and clitoris the way you like it. (If he’s paying attention, he’ll remember your pleasure pattern for next time.) If a little more wetness would feel a whole lot better, drizzle on some sex lube and revel in the slippery sensations. Take your time, create your pleasures, and you’ll zoom toward exotic new orgasms together.

Make His Entrance A Grand One

Once you’re ready, tilt your hips so the slope of your vagina complements his angle of erection. Off-angle penetration, even with plenty of lube, can be uncomfortable. But a harmonious slide inside always takes your breath away.

If you’re on top, be a bit of a tease: slide only the tip of his penis in and out to awaken the millions of pleasure cells at the entrance of your vagina. Then stop moving and give him a few loving squeezes with your PC muscles (and watch his eyes bulge out of his head).

Deepen the tease by easing him inside slowly (next time, when he thinks he knows what’s coming, surprise him with one swift graceful push to the hilt). Then, on your every slow, agonizing outstroke, squeeze his erection tight—or keep him fully submerged at your ideal angle for clitoral gyrating—and let nature take over.

Get Your Pump On

By nature’s design, most everything feels good to him once he’s inside you. But you can turn “good” into goodness-gracious-great-balls-of-fire! Here’s how:

Head Bob. Try stroking only the head of his penis inside the entrance to your vagina, in’n’out, over and over, till he must have all of you.

Combo Platter. Follow three luscious Head Bobs with one long, deep, graceful thrust. Repeat in rhythm.

Love Lever G. When he’s inside you, angle yourself so his penis probes your G-spot. To line up your pleasure spot, see chapter 10.

Dr. Sadie Sez: Play To His Orgasm Trigger.

Sweeten the pace of sex by adjusting your penetration style. If your lover’s got staying power, congratulations! And when you’re ready to wrap it up, try the Combo Platter on the opposite page to bring him to a rousing finish. If he’s got a hair-trigger, try the Divine Grind (below) to minimize friction to the head of his penis, while you enjoy delicious clitoral stimulation. Your mileage may vary, so keep experimenting till you find which strokes work best.

Divine Grind. While on top, don’t be shy about rubbing your clitoris into his cushiony pubic area, and taking control of your own pleasure while giving him deep thrills.

Knead To Speed. After a slow, teasing start, begin accelerating your pumping to fast ’n’ furious as his orgasm nears—being sure you stay well-aligned so you don’t hurt his penis! Or, if you started at jackhammer speed, slow it down for his grand finale, pumping with long, luxurious thrusting.

Deep Gulp. Try imagining your vagina as a warm, wet mouth determined to swallow and suck his erection with every delicious stroke. Grip and squeeze him on the way in, then release him on the way out—or vice versa! To strengthen your grip, see page 18.

Flower Show. Since your guy craves erotic visuals, try this: When you’re on top, spread open your labia with your fingertips, and let him watch his penis go in and out of you. Complete the erotic picture by licking your lips, playing with your breasts, arching your back, tossing your hair. He’ll be on Cloud Nine.

Rhythm Nation. There’s a reason sex is known as horizontal dancing—it’s the rhythm. Rather than pump mechanically—groove to the excitement of your lovemaking, pumping, grinding and swirling your hips in synch with your mutual passions as your entire bodies sway in harmony, including hips, shoulders and knees. Play your favorite CD.

Secrets To Being His Sexiest Pleasure Partner

Whether this is brand new to you, or merely a refresher course, the biggest thrills of sex are now in your capable hands:

During the walk to the car, in a darkened theater, or on the ride home, lean over and whisper, “I’m not wearing any panties.” You’ll rock his world.

Bring your favorite sextoys into bed with you. It’s good to share, and he may like it more than you think.

Play to his visual fantasies with props, wigs and outfits. Dress up like a sexy prostitute, horny school teacher or runaway nun. Then gaze deeply into his eyes, give him hot “come hither” looks, run your tongue over your lips and touch yourself all over. This is no time to be shy!

Don’t bypass his sensitive nipples. Just figure out whether he likes them nibbled, sucked, licked, tugged, pinched—or all of the above.

Engage your living sextoys—your hands! Suck on your fingers, then place them on his lips to be sucked. Send them exploring into sensitive crevices. Be imaginative!

To race stimulation into high gear, reach over and caress his balls like they’re two delicate eggs. Or massage his butt and tease his anus.

To slow a too-quick orgasm, try recreating a penis ring by encircling the base of his penis with your thumb and forefinger and squeezing firmly.

Time for a new position? Don’t wait for him to decide. Take charge and realign your bodies—even better if it’s a position you two have never tried!

Dr. Sadie Sez: Four ways To GUARANTEE Super Sex.

Be expressive—steer him to your hotspots with whispers and moans.

Be enthusiastic—raise the heat with some new erotic confidence.

Be generous—give in bed and ye shall receive in bed.

Practice sex safely—all the time.

When you’re on the bottom, wrap your legs around hi hips and pull him into you. Gyrate just how YOU like it, with circles and arches that create the angles you love.

Will he go for buttplay? Find out: send your hands and mouth inching toward his butt cheeks for erotic massaging, tonguing and even spanking. If he starts moaning and arching toward you as you slowly approach and encircle his sensitive anus, you’ll have your answer!

Feeling voyeuristic? Try a few strategically placed mirrors around the room for a front-row seat to your own lovemaking. See how erotic it is to watch your lover’s every in-out thrust as he penetrates you. More beautiful than you thought? Now you know why guys are so visual.

Out of breath? Take a break—this isn’t a marathon. Nibble on chocolate, sip some water, catch your breath. Then get back to business.

Why Silence Is Not Golden

If sex is starting to sound like a night at the library, perhaps it’s time to start opening your mouths for a new reason…

Language. Often the right words at the right time can send your lover into overdrive. Whisper how sexy he is, how much you want him, how hot he makes you, and if you love him, why not tell him?

Talk dirty. Between two lovers, dirty talk at the height of passion can ignite a true orgasmic firestorm. You may feel the bonds of upbringing holding you back, but it can also feel liberating to let them go. Look him in the eye, and in a breathless whisper say, “I am so wet for you!” or “I want to ride you, BAD,” or “Lick my tits!” Then watch him race into high gear. For real fireworks, when you reach that point-of-no-return, scream out, “I’m coming!”

Express yourself. Instead of words, let him know how good he makes you feel with sex sounds. This will also guide him to keep doing what he’s doing. Let your low moans, deep breathing, shake-the-rafters ohhhhs and long sensual aaaaaaahhhhs be the soundtrack of your growing arousal.

Listen. His vocalizations are clues to what he likes (and what he doesn’t). And if you hear him moaning, “Just like THAT. Yes! Right there. Don’t stop!”—then don’t stop—no matter what!

Ask. It’s okay to find out what he’s craving by coyly asking, “Does this feel good?” or “Should I rub a little harder?” If you don’t open your mouth, you run the risk of wondering, “Am I doing this right?” or “Does he even like what I’m doing?”

Talk sex. That’s right, but not just when you’re in bed. Candid discussions out of the heat of passion can lead to much hotter passion later.

Humankind owes a great big thank you to Mother Nature. After all, how many four-legged creatures will ever experience the thrill of face-to-face intercourse, ohhhing and aahhing into each other’s furry ears?

Yet for us two-legged upright types, Missionary is one of the most natural positions of all—a perfect complement to our human physique as well as our mutual angles of penetration. Perhaps that’s why it’s the best starter position for budding lovers, easily solving those sticky first-time who-goes-how-and-where situations.

Regardless of its puzzling and totally un-sexy name, Missionary stands as one of Mother Nature’s proudest evolutionary achievements. Think of it as her loving gift to you.

Your Mission: Make It Even Better

By treating Missionary as a thrilling journey rather than an everyday commute, you demonstrate what drives true erotic creativity.

When you spread out the pull of gravity over your bodies, you’re free to explore with your fingers, lips, tongue, eyes and ears. Slide a moistened fingertip or three into your lover’s most arousable spots. Press your mouths together in a hot, wet kiss to simulate your hot, wet penetration down below. Tune your ears to the faintest whispers and moans escaping your lover’s lips. Lock eyes as passions rise and revel in your lover’s private orgasm face.

Then, just when you think it can’t get any better, try some of the lusty position variations illustrated for you in this chapter.

Limbs: Your Levers Of Love

You don’t have to hang from the rafters to experience wild new sensations—simply fine tune your angles of penetration for stronger orgasms. But instead of just re-aiming your penis or vagina, try adjusting the mechanics of your arms and legs for surprising new pleasures.

Access. When the woman bends her knees and spreads them outward, the man gains deeper access to stimulate her clitoris with his fleshy pubic area, as well as penis-stroke her G-spot.

Depth. When she raises her legs, his penis can plunge even deeper. If she places her knees in his armpits, or her legs over his shoulders, or her legs high over her head, the dramatic new angles can lead to dramatic new orgasms. To maximize comfort, play to the relative length of your penis-to-vagina fit (they both grow as arousal heightens). Caution: Never plunge too deep too fast, since pain or injury can occur to the cervix at the end of the canal.

Friction. When she extends her legs straight, and he places his legs outside hers, he can grind into her clitoris as she grips him with her tightened vagina. Score extra points if there’s no “slip out” during the switch! Caution: Trim pubic hair around the vaginal lips (labia) to avoid irritating the base of his penis.

Closeness. When she wraps her legs behind his back, she can pull him closer for intimate grinding on her clitoris. He can enhance the effect by rocking and rolling rather than thrusting.

Cowboys Only!

Hip! Hip! Excitement!

Try resisting the urge to buck like a wild pornstar. Instead, think of your hips as a powerful locomotive—with you at the controls.

Swooper Man. Swivel your hips down and around till you find what feels good. Then tuck your pelvis under during each up-swoop. Be sure there’s plenty of lube to smooth your moves.

Grinder Guy. Sink your penis deep inside and grind your fleshy pubic mound into her clitoris (this may even help you extend pleasure by slowing down your orgasm). Then pull back just far enough to slide your slippery fingertip onto her excited clitoris.