150 Movies You Should See Before You Die (52 page)

DIRECTOR
Stephen Chiodo

STARS
Grant Cramer (
Mike Tobacco
), John Allen Nelson (
Dave Hanson
), Suzanne Snyder (
Debbie Stone
), John Vernon (
Officer Curtis Mooney
), Michael Siegel (
Rich Terenzi
), and Peter Licassi (Paul Terenzi)

Aliens who look and behave like circus clowns invade a small town … and turn the citizens into klown kibble.

Why It Sucks

Face it: clowns are just creepy!
Killer Klowns from Outer Space
is a nightmare if you have clownophobia. For the rest of us, it's a supremely goofy movie — albeit with some pacing problems — and a great theme song.

Thumbs Down Rating:

The Crappies

The Special Recognition in Underachievement in the Area of Stunt
Work Award goes to …
A weakly done car crash that illustrates what can happen when producers/writers/directors overreach the reality of a meager budget. (According to the Stephen Chiodi, the stunt went wrong, but there was no money in the budget to try it again.)

And the Worst Director Award goes to …
Stephen Chiodo for the lame, forced happy ending that undermines an emotionally powerful bit of self-sacrifice.

They Really Said It!

Officer Curtis Mooney
: I got through Korea; I can get through this bullshit.

Betcha Didn't Know

Killer Klowns From Outer Space
features homages to the films of Alfred Hitchcock. The easiest to spot is a shot of water swirling down a drain, with a toilet bowl standing in for a shower drain.

Have fun and see if you can spot others!

In the original cut, Dave perished heroically in order to save everyone else from a giant klown, but an executive at distributor Trans World Entertainment thought the movie needed a happy ending. As a result, Dave survives, thus proving that executives shouldn't have creative input on movies.

Trivia Quiz

What singer and musician starred in a movie where a clown may or may not be a serial killer?

A: Weird Al Yankovic

B: Tiny Tim

C: Madonna

D: Danny Elfman

Answer: B. In Bill Rebane's 1987 slasher flick
Blood Harvest
, Tiny Tim played Marvelous Mervo.

PRODUCER
J. Edward Arnolds (executive producer) and Edward D. Wood Jr. (producer)

WRITER
Edward D. Wood Jr.

DIRECTOR
Edward D. Wood Jr.

STARS
Gregory Walcott (
Jeff Trent
), Mona McKinnon (
Paula Trent
), John Breckinridge (
the Ruler
), Dudley Manlove (
Eros
), Joanna Lee (
Tanna
), Tom Keene (
Col. Tom Edwards
), Criswell (
himself
), Tor Johnson (
Inspector Daniel Clay
), and Lyle Talbot (
General Roberts)

Aliens from some unnamed planet come to Earth to animate the dead — because that's what Plan 9 calls for. Will a dashing airline pilot and verbose military officers save the world from the aliens and their horde of three zombies?

Why It Sucks

Plan 9 From Outer Space
has been called the worst movie ever made, but it is also strangely entertaining. Through its absurd dialogue and technical gaffes, it draws you in. You'll wonder if this movie can possibly get any worse. The answer is invariably “yes,” right up to the big showdown between our hero and the dastardly Master of Plan, Eros (played by a fellow named Manlove).

Thumbs Down Rating:

The Crappies

The Worst Auteur Award goes to …
Edward D. Wood Jr. for making a movie that's unevenly paced, with dialogue so full of non sequiturs you have to wonder if he's doing it on purpose. The alien civilization is so idiotic and unintentionally hilarious that the movie has become the poster child for an entire genre of bad films.

And the Special Made for Change Found Between the Cushions and Looks Like It Award goes to …
Edward D. Wood Jr. for a movie with the worst sets you're likely to see outside a grade school stage production, combined with special effects so pathetic even a mother couldn't love them.

They Really Said It!

Criswell
: We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives. And remember, my friends, future events such as these will affect you in the future.

Betcha Didn't Know

The film was completed in 1956, but it took three years to find a distributor who was willing to pick it up.

Criswell was a journalist turned professional psychic. It is claimed (by Criswell) that he was accurate 80 percent of the time. His prediction that the world would end in 2001 was among the 20 percent of the incorrect ones.

Trivia Quiz

Which actor appearing in
Plan 9
costarred in films with Ginger Rogers?

A: Bela Lugosi

B: Dudley Manlove

C: Tor Johnson

D: Lyle Talbot

Answer: D. Lyle Talbot costarred in the low-budget mysteries
The Thirteenth Guest
(1932) and
A Shriek in the Night
(1933), both of which costarred Ginger Rogers.

PRODUCERS
Robert Shay (executive producer) and Mark Forstater (producer)

WRITERS
Iain Cassie and Robert Smith (script), Harry Bromley Davenport and Michel Parry (story)

DIRECTOR
Harry Bromley Davenport

STARS
Bernice Stegers (
Rachael Phillips
), Philip Sayer (
Sam Phillips
), Danny Brainin (
Joe Daniels
), Maryam D'Abo (
Analise Mercier
), and Simon Nash (
Tony Phillips
)

Three years after being abducted by aliens, Sam (Sayer) returns a very different man. And then he passes his newly acquired gooey, gory alien powers on to his young son (Nash).

Why It Sucks

Although creepy at times and downright terrifying at others, the film is overlong. Too much bland acting and too many lazy attempts to cover plot holes. And
waaay
too much Stupid Character Syndrome.