The Boudoir Bible (18 page)

While the use of barriers will reduce tensions and inhibitions that many lovers associate with anal stimulation, the only way to completely extinguish the fear of encountering feces is to eliminate them from the rectum altogether. Making simple cleansing preparations before the Sexual Ceremony will facilitate your own and your lover’s comfort and sense of security.

Anal cleanliness begins from within. The way in which we nourish ourselves determines not only how we look and feel but how our digestive tract functions, too. The more balanced our diets are, the cleaner the entire organism will be. A high-fiber diet makes for more solid excrement, which is easier for the body to eliminate and less likely to leave traces in the digestive tract. This kind of feces is a sign of intestinal health and nutritional balance. Soft feces are often a result of an unbalanced, low-fiber diet and can generate serious health problems over time. Their presence in the intestine is
often accompanied with a sense of bloating, which may reduce our libido. A well-balanced, high-fiber diet should thus be considered essential to both general and sexual health.

The last organ to hold fecal material after its passage through the colon is the rectum. In your preparation for the Paradise Found Sexual Ceremony, douching will cleanse this area as well as the lower rectum (also termed the anal canal) and the anus. If it is performed an hour or so before the ceremony commences, it will stimulate bowel movement, thereby completely emptying the large intestine—a liberating feeling that is also conducive to the libido. Regardless of whether or not partners intend to engage in anal stimulation, this form of hygiene provides an overall sense of cleanliness and well-being, which always promotes sexual satisfaction.

Note that anal douching is not the same as deep colon cleansing, a.k.a. hydrocolonic cleansing or colonic irrigation. Deep colon cleansing, a treat for the body, is the work of a specialist and entails having large quantities of lukewarm water filtered through the rectum into the sigmoid colon, the S-shaped curve of the large intestine that lies closest to the rectum, and possibly farther, and then extracted again. As recovery from this cleansing and the reacclimatizing of the digestive system can take a few days, I recommend it as a longer-term treatment before the Sexual Ceremony—a gift to yourself during the change of seasons, for example, as it hydrates the entire body, eliminates toxins, and generates a healthy glow.

Mae West’s Beauty Secret

Compared to deep colon cleansing, anal douching involves filtering only small quantities of water through the anus into the rectum, so it can be performed in the comfort of your own bathroom. A rectal douche is within the realm of possibility in a daily health regimen—actress Mae West declared that anal douching, which she integrated into her daily beauty routine, was the secret behind her
impeccable complexion. Another health benefit that anal douching rewards us with is relief from the symptoms of anal tension, including constipation.

As one of the most sensitive areas of the body, the anus, like the stomach and the intestines, is extremely susceptible to the repercussions of stress and negative energy. Anal tension is a common side effect of anxiety; it can cause intestinal irritation as well as constipation, leading to any number of conditions, including hemorrhoids. These conditions decrease the libido and, thus, anal receptivity. The more relaxed and healthy we feel in general, the more likely we are to be receptive to any form of sexual stimulation.

Enema bulbs and “pears” are the most common douching devices; vaginal pears can also be used anally. However, do not use the same device to administer both anal and vaginal douches. Note that vaginal douching disturbs the natural pH balance of the vagina, increasing the likelihood of infections. Unlike rectal douching, it should only be practiced under the recommendation of a doctor to treat specific medical conditions.

Enema bags, which usually hold one quart of liquid, are not only more time-consuming to use but increase the likelihood that water will fill the rectum and seep into the sigmoid colon. Being that it will take the body longer to eliminate the excess water, the use of enema bags is therefore not recommended prior to the Sexual Ceremony.

Water is the ideal solution for anal douching. Commercial douching solutions and enemas contain chemicals and so should be avoided; the chemicals will be absorbed into your system, altering the pH of the intestinal tract and its natural functions. If you purchase traditional enema bulbs containing douche solutions, empty their contents and refill them with clean, warm water.

The ideal water temperature for rectal douching is that of your body temperature, 98.6°F (37°C). Water that is too cold will cause
cramping, and water that is too hot can damage the delicate tissues. Run the water over your inner wrist to ensure that it is as close to body temperature as possible before filling your douching device.

Ready, Steady, Breathe

When you’re ready to give yourself a douche, follow these directions: Fill your douching device with no more than about one cup of water. (More may result in water entering the sigmoid colon and stimulating the peristaltic action of the entire intestine.) Lubricate both the nozzle of the enema bulb and your anus. Spread a towel on the bathroom floor, lie down on your left side, which eases pressure on the lower digestive tract, and make yourself comfortable. Remember that having something enter or exit your anus is easier upon your exhalation, so when you are ready, breathe out while inserting the nozzle into your anus. Relax into the sensations that penetrating the organ generates, then gradually fill the rectum with water. Your body will tell you when you reach rectal capacity by stimulating peristalsis—the evacuation reflex. Thereupon, go immediately to the toilet.

During the first cleansing you will probably also release feces that were lingering in the rectum. Resume your relaxed, supine position and repeat the process. It may take another douche or two to complete the entire elimination. Depending on how you feel, you may stop at any time. Once every trace of fecal matter held in the rectum has exited the body, the water you pass will look clear. Always wait about thirty to sixty minutes after douching before you engage in anal play, in order to be certain that all of the liquid has been eliminated from your system.

Rinse and Repeat

An easy, effective, and time-efficient alternative to traditional douching devices like pears and bulbs is the shower douche, a device
designed to screw directly onto the end of a flexible shower hose, in place of the showerhead. It normally has a tubular-shaped nozzle, but it may also take the form of an anal plug. Shower douches are available today through most male-oriented sex shops, as well as online, but equally effective results may be attained through the following procedure, if you have a showerhead attached to a flexible hose.

First unscrew the showerhead. If the attachment has a loose rubber seal, set that aside in order to avoid its slipping down the drain. Adjust the temperature of the water and its pressure so that it exits the hose at the slowest jet possible. While sitting on the edge of the bathtub, or assuming a squatting position in the shower, position the end of the hose against—
not inside
—the anal orifice. Allow the water to gradually fill the anal canal and rectum. This will take only a few seconds. Exercise control over your sphincter muscles, and go straight to the toilet. Repeat the process, until clear water exits the body.

If you suffer from anal anxiety, you may not wish to do any form of anal douching, even though it is the most effective way to ensure cleanliness; however, no one should feel obliged to undergo the procedure. Fecal particles can, in fact, also be removed manually while you are bathing or showering. Manual cleansing also provides an excellent opportunity to develop a greater sense of anal awareness and acceptance. Take care to avoid letting soap enter the anal canal, as it is likely to irritate the tissues of the rectum. Establish a deep, regular breathing pattern to relax mind and body; upon exhalation, penetrate the anus with your middle finger; and remove any stagnant fecal matter. You may find there is actually very little residue in the anal canal if you are eating a high-fiber diet and your feces are solid. For optimal hygiene and to keep fingernails from injuring tender tissues, use latex gloves.

Being that excrement moves continuously through the small intestine into the colon and the rectum, anal cleansing, no matter the
method you prefer, can be repeated during intermissions of lengthy sexual rituals, if and when the need arises.

Once the “rosebud” has been cleansed, it can be approached with peace of mind. Novices to the pleasures of anal stimulation may learn to explore the anus in the solo masturbation ritual before incorporating anal play into the Paradise Found Sexual Ceremony, and I hope that you find that bonding with this part of your sexual anatomy is more pleasurable than you ever imagined!

Use a handheld mirror to look at your anus while exploring its outer area manually. Use plenty of lubrication and take your time. When you feel ready, proceed inward to discover the anal canal and the soft walls of the rectum. The anus itself represents the greatest concentration of nerve endings in the anal area, so keep in mind that the rectum, like the vagina, is more sensitive in its first third of depth, as measured from the collar of the anus. Become aware of all of the sensations that stimulating and penetrating the orifice provides. As you learn to accept the sensitive organ as an ally in pleasure, the anxieties you may have associated with it will gradually dissolve.

The following guidance to anal play is from the point of view of the
provider
of such pleasures; if your erotic desire is to be on the
receiving
end, these instructions will provide insight into how you can direct your lover. If you are disinclined to explore anal play, please don’t skip over this section! Reading through it will help you to understand why others desire such pleasures—and it is through this kind of understanding that we evolve further along our own sexual paths.

If you are playing with a partner who is normally receptive to anal stimulation, remember that it is still important to obtain his or her consent before engaging in anal play. If you know your lover
well enough to read his or her body language, this can be as simple as gently testing your partner’s receptivity. Otherwise, ask for permission. If your partner is in the mood, apply lubricant and take the time to tantalize and entice the anus to reception with the tips of your fingers, your tongue, or your lips. If your intention is to penetrate your lover’s anus, these pleasures must be considered essential preliminaries.

Invitation to Advance

Once your consenting lover is genuinely relaxed and aroused, and his or her anus has swollen to receptive excitement, you may attempt to advance inward. Before proceeding to do so, abundant lubrication should be reapplied externally and, ideally, internally, too. This is possible through the use of lubrication syringes, which may be purchased in male-oriented sex shops or on the Internet. Traditional syringes will also work equally well. Once you have removed and properly disposed of the needle, fill the syringe with lubricant.

Ask your aroused lover to take a deep breath and hold it for a few seconds before exhaling. Upon his or her exhalation, slowly insert the tip of the syringe into the anus and inject the lubricant. Set the syringe aside nearby, as you may need to make consecutive applications as the ritual proceeds. Anal penetration should always be slow-going, while communication should always be free-flowing.

You can now stimulate the entryway to the anal canal. If your lover is a novice, invite him or her to take a deep breath, and upon the exhalation, penetrate his or her anus by applying light pressure to its center with the tip of the middle finger. The middle finger is an ideal tool for the initial phases of penetration (some lovers consider it to be the only tool!). Those who enjoy being penetrated with more than one finger, or with a penis or dilettos, will still usually need to be dilated with a smaller object first. The middle finger serves this purpose well.

Once inside, gradually enter the orifice up to approximately the first knuckle of your middle finger—then
don’t move
. Stay still, and allow your lover to ease into the sensations and control the depth of penetration. You will soon feel his or her anal sphincters begin to relax. If you sense that your partner is tense, invite him or her to breathe deeply—filling lungs to capacity, holding the breath briefly at the end of the inhalation, and exhaling slowly while consciously relaxing all of the muscles that compose the genital system, including the sphincters—to facilitate penetration. This manner of breathing will also heighten your partner’s perception of pleasure.

As anal tension subsides, continue to massage the walls of the anal canal slowly and patiently. Stroke its muscular walls in circular patterns, but patiently refrain from advancing inward. (Remember that no one is obliged to accept penetration, but if your lover is enjoying what you are doing, he or she is likely to beg you to proceed!)

Grant Your Lover’s Wishes

Once you feel the walls relax, you may begin to move gradually inward. Be aware of his or her breathing pattern at all times. If your lover forgets to breathe regularly, remind him or her to do so. Continue massaging the muscular anal canal in circular patterns while working inward gradually and lovingly.

If at any moment your lover seems to be experiencing anything but pleasure and emotional bliss, slow down. If your lover doesn’t ease into the sensations, ask what you can do to make him or her more comfortable. If you are asked to stop what you are doing, respect those wishes, and, first inviting your lover to breathe in deeply, exit his or her body upon exhalation as carefully and patiently as you entered.

If, on the other hand, your lover is enjoying the exploration, you may continue on. You will notice that as arousal grows, the sphincter muscles will grow noticeably more supple and receptive, and you will be able to pass into the anal canal and outward again with ease.
Allow your lover to guide you both physically and verbally at all times. In preparation for deeper penetration, lubrication can be reapplied if necessary. This time, you will be able to insert the syringe deeper into the anal canal; slowly inject its entire contents directly into the rectum. Remove the syringe on your lover’s exhalation and proceed to re-penetrate the anus, granting your lover’s wishes.