The Boudoir Bible (15 page)

No matter the tools or the techniques employed to facilitate ejaculation control, once men have learned to recognize and respond effectively to their point of no return, they can engage in extensive periods of stimulation and heighten their satisfaction!

THE PHENOMENON OF
ejaculation was considered to be the greatest difference between male and female sexual functions until the beginning of the 1980s, when the female prostate and its palpable manifestation, the G-spot, were rediscovered and their connection to female emission scientifically proven.

Yet in spite of the clinical research, laboratory testing, and case studies from the past thirty years, female ejaculation and the related but very different jets or streams of “squirting” continue to be a topic of controversy. The facts, however, are that fluid produced in the female prostate during heightened states of arousal contains biochemical components comparable to those in semen, including prostate-specific antigen (PSA) which happens to be produced in only one other gland in the human body: the male prostate! The fluids from ejaculation and squirting exit the body, just as male ejaculate does, via the urethral
canal. Misinformed lovers commonly mistake female squirting for urine; this misperception can lead to debilitating feelings of shame in women and confusion in men.

Some researchers and doctors tiptoe around the topic by maintaining that women once had the ability to ejaculate, but as it merely served an antibacterial function in reproduction, the organ responsible for ejaculation atrophied with the advent of modern hygiene. Many medical professionals continue to deny scientific evidence altogether. This has led to the acute lack of accurate public information about female emissions, which in turn not only propagates the female ejaculation taboo but also leads perfectly healthy women to seek surgical “cures” for squirting, which was diagnosed as coital incontinence in the 1950s.

The Paradise Found Sexual Ceremony brings lovers into contact with the whole of their sexual beings—as men explore heightened pleasure through prostate stimulation and the delights of delay, women discover entirely new horizons of pleasure when their G-spot awakens. But it is important to keep in mind that, like any journey in life, the sexual path is the destination: women, seek G-spot orgasms and create the conditions to prompt emissions, but don’t let that goal keep you from enjoying every other source of pleasure that you will experience along the way.

Female emissions, represented in ancient art, artifacts, architecture, and literature throughout all cultures, is often depicted or described as a river or stream flowing from the female genitals. Poetic names from ancient literature reflect the positive manner in which the phenomenon was viewed: the flood of Venus, the elixir of life, the sacred river, the nectar of the gods, and the lotus nectar. The
Kama
Sutra
speaks of female emissions in terms of “seed that … continues to fall from the beginning of the sexual union to its end.” The elixir was renowned by the Taoists for its legendary ability to reverse the aging process. Skilled lovers in sixteenth-century Japan collected the aphrodisiacal cocktail in bowls designed specifically to capture its flux. Those who consumed the fluid felt all the happier and more rejuvenated. This may in part be explained by the traces of the neurotransmitter serotonin that female emission contains.

Other cultures known to have considered female emission as an essential aspect of female pleasure were the Tantrists, the ancient Greeks and Romans, the Celts, the Cherokee Indians in North America, and the Trukese of the Coral Islands in the South Pacific; in all of these societies, female emissions were viewed as symbols of woman’s “masculine” side, a perspective that rendered women sexually equal to men.

The generation of prostate fluid is the body’s involuntary physiological response to arousal, and nothing can prevent the intricate network of ducts and glands that compose the female prostate, the largest of which is known as the Skene’s gland, from producing this fluid. But over the centuries, like the female orgasm itself, this biological response was repressed to the point that the majority of women essentially have “forgotten” how to ejaculate! However, most highly aroused women emit imperceptible quantities of prostate fluid through the urethral opening before, during, and after orgasm. Those who “remember” how to ejaculate and abandon themselves to the sensations that lead up to ejaculation may also “squirt”—clinical reports giving the amount of fluid as between 1 and 3 ounces (25 and 100 milliliters)! Labeled
femmes fontaines
, literally “fountain ladies,” by the French psychologist
Frédérique Gruyer in 1984, these women are proof that the female prostate has not atrophied; they constitute, however, a mere 6 to 8 percent of the female population today.

Every sexually mature woman has a prostate and paraurethral glands that produce and store prostate fluid (even if most anatomical charts for the female genital system still fail to represent these). Theoretically, any woman can learn to create the conditions for ejaculation and squirting and revel in the heightened degrees of sexual satisfaction that they excite—and the empowering sense of equality that accompanies emission. We may therefore conclude that what women seem to be missing, more than anything else, are equally informed, sufficiently liberated, and well-skilled partners!

Fast PGO sex does not promote female emissions, while the Paradise Found Sexual Ceremony, with its slow building of sexual tension, provides lovers with the perfect opportunity to explore the ecstatic powers of the G-spot and encourage the flow of female fluids. The prime conditions are extensive periods of stimulation, heightened degrees of arousal, direct G-spot stimulation, multiple orgasms, lack of inhibition, and being truly attracted to and confident with one’s partner, which instills a sense of ease and openness to what may come. Lovers who revel in the pleasures that lead to female emissions consider the G-spot to be the source of unequaled delight and emission to be a highlight of their sexual endeavors, as well as the most generously ecstatic way for a woman to thank her partner for worshipping her to such an extent.

Female ejaculate fluid has the look and consistency of semen, while squirt is noted for its clarity and has the consistency of water. Its distinct perfume is most commonly described as the refreshing smell of spring rain, but some women also report their emissions as having salty sea tones, floral scents, or earthy undertones of amber, musk, or moss. These variations are determined in part by variations in diet. The transparency of squirt may vary and even become slightly cloudy with
approaching menstruation. Women, if you eventually revitalize your capacity to squirt, ask your lover to collect some of the liquid that you emit in a glass or bowl as it leaves your body. Smell and even taste it just as our ancient ancestors did, and invite your partner to do the same. This can be an extremely exciting aspect of the Sexual Ceremony (but obviously one that should only be shared by lovers who have a safe fluid-exchange agreement).

Facilitate your heavenly delight by playing on surfaces that will not be damaged by liquids and protecting those that could be damaged with towels. Consider investing in a latex sheet. Designed to fit various sizes of mattresses, it can be purchased online and in most sex shops. Whether you are a novice to G-spot stimulation or an experienced femme fontaine, being worried about making a mess will hold you back from abandoning yourself to the pleasures of G-spot stimulation.

Awakening the G-spot takes blissful time and a relaxed state of mind and body, so it’s best to initiate this kind of exploration when you have the time and energy to build sexual tension to the heights. And, of course, leave expectations that lead to performance-pressure out of the boudoir. Even the most insensitive, sleepy, or oversensitized G-spot can be coaxed to sweet reception, if sufficient care and attention are dedicated to “retraining” it to respond positively to direct contact.

Note that the G-spot is connected to the powerful pelvic splanchnic nerve, and so stimulating the area may evoke more emotional responses than those derived through clitoral stimulation. It is for this reason that Tantric lovers associate G-spot stimulation with the opening of the heart chakra, and the foundation of intimate bonds between partners.

Women, that means that if you are a novice to the effects of G-spot stimulation, you may wish to explore the zone on your own first. A solo
masturbation ritual will help you get to know your G-spot and permit those who suffer from G-spot numbness, oversensitivity, or related anxiety to awaken the sensitive area gradually and experience the deep degrees of satisfaction it can and should provide. Once you feel comfortable with G-spot stimulation on your own, invite your lover to help navigate your sacred river.

Most informed lovers are more than willing to share in the mutual delights of G-spot stimulation and female ejaculation, but some men may initially fear that their own pleasure will dissipate in the time that it takes to awaken the G-spot and provoke emission. Others may be intimidated by women’s potential to ejaculate and squirt repeatedly without compromising their sexual fulfillment or their desire. But G-spot stimulation can only augment the male partner’s pleasure, as the Paradise Found Sexual Ceremony transpires over extended periods of arousal in which both partners alternately provide and receive sensations, both genitally and extra-genitally oriented. In addition, if the male partner is skilled in the techniques of ejaculation control, he will have plenty of occasions to reach the pinnacles of his own pleasure—keep in mind that the most effective aphrodisiac is the pleasure that we provide.

If you are an experienced femme fontaine, never take an unknowing lover by surprise, but rather participate directly in the dismantling of the female emission taboo by preparing him or her in advance. Guiding your partner lovingly, especially in a ritualized context that is conducive to mutual arousal, will reinforce your intimate bond while allowing your partner to develop the sexual skills that call the G-spot into action.

Stroking the G-spot before the physical signs of female arousal have fully manifested is likely to cause more discomfort than pleasure, while climaxing, either clitorally or via the A-spot (the zone that lies deep within the vaginal canal near the cervix) increases the G-spot’s receptivity to touch, as the female prostate becomes engorged with ejaculate fluid. Envision the highly sensitive G-spot as the delta of the
sacred river that originates in the prostate. You must awaken the receptivity of the G-spot in order to eventually encourage the emission of its sacred fluids.

A woman who is a novice to the G-spot’s powers should orgasm, then “peak” (repeatedly push one’s orgasmic limit without cumming) before making direct contact with the highly sensitive area. The more charged with sexual vibration, the greater her receptivity to any form of stimulation. As soon as the warm, soft interiors of the vaginal canal are well lubricated and the female genitals begin to swell with pleasure, the G-spot will become more turgid and thus easier to locate. Some lovers confuse the wetness that high levels of sexual arousal generate in the vagina with female ejaculation, but remember that female emissions do not exit the body through the vaginal opening but directly through the urethral opening. However, just like the swelling of the G-spot, vaginal lubrication indicates that the G-spot is receptive to touch and signals that ejaculate fluid is beginning to build inside the female prostate.

Once arousal has deepened and the genitals have become engorged with excitement, great attention can be dedicated to the G-spot. For a novice, the fingers are the best method for understanding the zone, whether you are a woman exploring her own G-spot in a solo masturbation ritual or the partner of a woman.

Feel for a slightly raised mass of tissue approximately the size and shape of an almond on the anterior wall of the vagina, close to the vaginal opening. Explore its contours and then stroke it, gradually increasing the pressure. The pressure you apply should never generate discomfort. Meditate on the G-spot: Focus your full attention on the area and experiment with the range of sensations it provides. Women, breathe
deeply and with intention into these sensations as they gradually build, and the pleasure will be accompanied by an elevated state of relaxation and mental clarity. During this erotic meditation, your sensory awareness will become ever more acute—augmenting your perception of pleasure and allowing the sensations to radiate from the genitals to the extremities of the body. Body, mind, and spirit will benefit.